The Little Psycho-Thing
by N3v3rM1nd
Summary: Being betrayed by his own father wasn't something new to him. But Happy had no idea what kind of a turn his life is about to take, when he entered the cell of an actual prison instead of juvie - Some people call it soulmate, but Happy just called it "The Trager-Phenomenon".
1. Prolog

Hey guys!

I'm happy you found your way to this story and hope you'll enjoy reading, as much as I enjoy writing it.

Unfortunately I got a bit stuck in Crows Of A Feather Flock Together and I'm not really sure how I exactly want it to go on. Mainly because there is always this other plot-bunny jumping around my head, what is distracting me all the time. So I thought, I'll just give it a try and see if you guys like it.

I have to admit, I actually don't have a big thing for stories where the OC is already connected to the series characters, but, of course, there are exceptions and it seems like I've found one myself I want to write about.

A huge thanks to **DontWannaBeAClue** for editing this story!

The Story is rated **M** for sexual content, language and violence.

**Trigger-warning!** \- After trying to make up a past for certain characters in the show and my OC, I probably will touch some sensitive territories, though I don't know how detailed it will be. If it happens, I will label it at the start of a chapter.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

**Summary: **Being betrayed by his own father wasn't something new to him. But Happy had no idea what kind of a turn his life is about to take, when he entered the cell of an actual prison instead of juvie - Some people call it soulmate, but Happy just called it "the Trager-phenomenon".


	2. Smiley Face

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

Happy grumbled lowly when he'd turn the key just halfway to unlock the door that he then pushed open to enter the hallway slowly. Putting his duffle-bag on the floor before slipping out of his boots, he wrinkled his nose in disgust when he smelled the aftermath of the long run rising up from his feet.

He could take care of that later though.

"How many times do I've to tell you to lock the fucking door?" He asked loudly, taking a look at the small clock on the little dresser beside the door. He shook his head slightly; it was too late for the door to be unlocked, even in a good neighborhood like this. Every fucker that made his way into the house would've gone completely unnoticed. The house was big enough for two, while Alex used to be upstairs around this time of the day, sitting at her desk, headphones on her head, not hearing shit. He'd suggested selling it and buy a smaller one, since her brother wasn't coming back after he transferred down to Charming to be near his kids and to handle that bitch he unfortunately called his baby-mama. But all she said in response was a simple "_And where would you sleep then?"_, taking the matter off the table in seconds.

It was sort of a second home for him. He even had his own room. Actually it was her brother's old room she'd made to a spare-room for whatever guest was showing up. But he was the one using it the most, and preferred to give up his own apartment to whatever visitor came over from other charters, instead of letting her be with some more or less strange brother. And there was nothing wrong with that, since she'd even decorated it his kinda way, so that it would feel more like a home to him. Not that he'd a big thing for decoration, but he didn't mind it either as long as it wasn't sickening his stomach because of too many knick-knacks.

"It's locked…well, it was, until you unlocked it." She replied dryly in her usual sassiness, calling out obviously from the living room. So he made his way over, leaning in the doorway and watching her struggle with whatever project she came up with today.

"No, it wasn't." He said, kinda exhausted, knowing she probably didn't give a shit anyway. He tried to teach her to lock the door for almost thirteen years now and yet, she didn't lock the fucking door. She was a hopeless case, he already knew about that. It was just too hard to accept it.

Apparently she got a new cupboard and was now fighting getting it together. It was one of those new and fancy ones, all white and fashionable and contemporary; the complete opposite to the one her brother had gotten them more than fifteen years ago. Happy was fine with that though, as long as it wasn't pink or covered in flowers, he wasn't about to complain. Not that he had much of a say in this kind of things. In the end, it wasn't his house and if Alex felt like covering it in flowers, she would've covered it in fucking flowers. Fortunately, she didn't have a big things for flowers…or pink for that matter.

"Dinner is in the kitchen." She said, before grumbling to herself some colorful curses. He was amused.

She did have some talent and skills when it came down to the work of a handyman, even fixed a lot of shit around the house all on her own. She didn't have a problem with taking a wrench and fix up a water-pipe, as much as she was very aware of how to fix some electricity-stuff too. She was even able to put up drywall all alone. Things like that seemed to be normal when there were too many times with too little money to pay someone else to do it.

But a cupboard, that obviously was giving her a hard time and some big-ass struggle. It was cute though…sort of. And he had to hold back a chuckle when she began to cuss like a sailor all over again.

He went into the living-room and came to a halt behind her before he bent down, placing a kiss to the back of her head while reaching around her, trying to take the tool out of her angry hands.

He hadn't planned to get home from a long run and jump right into his barely existent assembler-mode, but what kind of an ass would he have been, when he just watched her breaking those small fingers with a screwdriver? Especially after she made dinner for him, and probably would take care of his laundry too…like she always did.

"I can do that." She said protesting and snappish, looking at him with irritation jumping out of those deep blue eyes right into his face. She'd done that since he'd known her.

"I know" So he just went with it, knowing it was pointless to argue her. She was too stubborn for that, he'd learned that the hard way throughout the years.

"Wanna eat with you, not watching you struggle in here while I do." He continued, causing her to pout, a little pissed before she wrinkled her nose. "You stink." She then retorted bluntly.

"Was on the road for five hours, girl…Gonna take a shower after dinner."

"What about you take a shower now, while I finish this and then we eat?" She offered, before he looked at the screwdriver, still held in both of their hands, causing him to let out an exhausted sigh.

"I'm not messing with your emancipation-bullshit…Nothing wrong with letting me help you."

"Nothing wrong with taking a shower either…speaking of emancipation — what kind of skank is sucking you off, when your feet stink like that?" She replied, although she gave him space to help her, by standing up, letting out a deep breath while he crouched down in front of her masterpiece.

"Just keep the boots on." He replied simply, apparently causing her mouth to twist into a distasteful grimace immediately.

"That's so gross, Hap."

"You were raised by a bunch of bikers and Old Ladies, mainly by Tig…I guess you've seen a lot worse than that…or smelled."

There was a long pause, while she tried once more to stare him down — unsuccessfully. Like always.

"Got a point." She finally replied and he looked up at her, chuckling to himself for a second before she bent down, placing a kiss to his bald head.

"Good you came home." She then said before she made her way out of the living room, letting him know her worry hadn't eased yet. She still was sour when it came down to runs, after her brother got taken by some assholes, being stuck in a dirty basement for days until SAMCRO was able to finally get him out again. Since then she'd forced him to text her at least once a day. Better was twice.

He listened to her shuffling around in the hallway, pretty sure she was already busy with his duffle and laundry. She'd started to do that after her brother moved down south, withdrawing a lot of things from her, like caring for his crazy ass every goddamn day. So she just changed the person, now caring for his well-being as much as she could. He'd already thanked Tig for moving down to Cali, because now he got home-cooked meals at least twice a week, left-overs for two more. He never had to worry about clean boxer-shorts and shirts and to top it all, his fridge's emptiness was non-existent anymore. She did his grocery shopping in all her femininity. There were apples and tomatoes, fresh milk, eggs and flummeries. He had bread and everything he needed to make himself a good sandwich. All that stuff that made his mother overly Happy. Causing her to look at him as if he'd grown a second head when she'd opened his fridge on a visit years ago.

He never had to worry about beer or whisky, and in case he had visitors, she took care of that too. There always was enough candy, chocolate and chips to be happy for the whole week, "Jesus, Hap…I'm not putting rubbers in your bag because they make you look so damn cool…fucking use them!" And of course, she worried about this kinda shit too.

"I do!" He replied loudly.

She didn't say anything, but he suddenly felt her presence behind him, so he turned to look at her while she leaned in the threshold, returning his gaze with a doubting one, sporting a cocked brow while holding up the untouched pack of unused condoms.

"Too busy for pussy." He stated simply, not caring much about the topic anymore. Sometimes he wasn't sure if he got another mother with her or a non-official, unmarried wife he wasn't fucking — not that he hadn't already thought about changing that.

Gross, no! He loved his mom, but the day he had the same thoughts about his mother as he had about Alex, was gonna be the day he sure would put a bullet in his head.

"Did you sleep?" She then asked, his words obviously not convincing.

"Yeah."

"Then you wasn't too busy." She stated, playing with the package in her hand in an absent sort of way.

Rolling his eyes he turned to go on with her cupboard, there still was a lot to do and he was fucking hungry.

"Guess I'm too old for that then." He answered before concentrating on the first door hinge.

"My brother's five years older than you. He can work for sixteen hours, drive for five more and the clubhouse could be under enemies fire and yet, he wouldn't miss out on Vegas-pussy. He probably would just push her from the bed and fuck her on the floor to be safe from any raining bullets."

Turning around he rested his upper arm on his knee, the screwdriver in his hand hanging down lazily while he looked at her dry expression. She wasn't joking and he knew why, so he snorted once before a chuckle began to escape his throat.

"Yeah…he's one sick bastard." He finally said.

"Well, in my book that's the reason why you two get along so well."

There was a smirk coming to his lips, knowing she was right, but then he moved to face the cupboard again, shaking his head slightly.

"Get a shower, Hap…you can finish this tomorrow."

* * *

The shower was good and did the trick. A perceived eternity of hot water patting down on his tired body was relaxing his overexerted and hurting muscles thoroughly. He was all about long runs, the longer the better. He couldn't get enough after hitting the road. But the aftermath wasn't quite as funny, especially after sleeping bad for days and dealing with some hard shit before. He always was a light sleeper on runs; too many incidences forced him to be. So he was looking forward to a night full of good, deep and never-ending sleep in an extreme comfortable bed without being disturbed from an always open eye.

After putting on fresh boxers and black sweats he always had at her place, he brushed his teeth thoroughly and spent some quality time with his razor, before he made his way into the joining bedroom. He found Alex stuffing the condoms into the big rag on the left side of the room before putting some tattoo-magazines onto the dresser behind the bed on the right.

"Some articles about new techniques that'll come up and stuff…thought you might wanna read." She explained, while fanning them out on the top neatly.

It was good to have someone doing the same for a living as he used to do years ago. With that he was always up to date, although he wasn't really in the scene anymore. Instead of a tattoo parlor he was working in a garage and he wasn't one to travel around the country, so that he could visit conventions and seminars; he just didn't find the time anymore and kept it low with just inking brothers and old ladies. But she did all of that and always came back with a lot of new or interesting things, telling him about it all excited and jumpy. She was better than him, that wasn't a secret, but he was fine with that. He just was happy that he was able to give her that opportunity all those years ago. Everyone had their strengths and his definitely was more on the mechanic side, while she didn't even know how to do a damn oil-change but was able to bring pure art to your skin.

Stepping behind her, he wrapped his arms around her waist, placing a kiss to her cheek from behind; "Thank you." And Alex turned in is arms, looking at him a little dumbfounded; "For what?"

"Don't know…for everything, I guess."

They fell silent for a while and his head forward until it found her shoulder to rest on. He enjoyed the closeness and the warmth radiating off of her against the bare skin of his shivering chest. Even in summer Tacoma wasn't quite a sauna at night.

"Feels good." He said lowly, enjoying the easing tension in his muscles while he inhaled her scent deeply. It hadn't changed since she was seventeen, after she'd gotten that perfume from Samy for her birthday. It was unique and feminine, and he still didn't know what exactly it was, but it just fitted her perfectly.

"You gonna tell me how you got that new patch?" And the tension was back. He didn't want to talk about that. He'd done what was necessary and now it was done. There was nothing to talk about again, that fucker wasn't worth the trouble. But she wouldn't let go of that. He knew her too well. And she knew well about the meaning behind the existing patches. Some of them were easy to figure out, some of them known by everyone and some meant to be mysterious, but she'd figured it out finally; all of them. And for the few she didn't, she just went to Tig.

Her brother didn't tell her shit, but he didn't lie to her either. He never did. So in case he didn't want her to know anything, he just kept quiet — what in other words was nothing but telling her the truth the second she asked the right question. She'd learned about that quickly and learned to use it just as fast.

It took her some time until she figured out what this specific patch meant after seeing it on Snipers cut. But finally, after almost five months she figured out the right question to ask: _Did he kill a member by order of the club?_

It was pointless to keep shit from her. She was too smart to be fooled.

"_I'm not stupid enough to think that increasing body-count on your abs_

_is showing off the numbers of bitches you've fucked."_

She wasn't even twenty-one when she'd stated that simply and unimpressed, and he looked at her dumbfounded, his eyes wide, his brain fuzzy. But then he remembered who it was, telling him that. A girl that was born in the 6th pit of hell, raised in the 3rd, until she found her final home which still was far away from heaven. She was a Trager and there was nothing normal about them. In fact, they were freakishly crazy. It probably was that craziness that was catching his attention.

"Spike" He finally said lowly, feeling her taking a deep breath, making him worry. He remembered she used to like that guy. Had fun with him whenever he visited Washington. Playing some cards, having some shots of tequila, talking with him the whole fucking night. He already thought there was more to their relationship, but there wasn't, they were just friends.

"You okay?" Her voice came to life quietly, before he was even able to ask the same. Her hand reached back to caress the back of his head gently and he knew she was smart enough to spare them more questions. He appreciated it.

"Don't know." He replied honestly, breathing the words out against her neck, as he pulled her closer. He was good with doing what had to be done, no matter what it was. He rarely felt bad about it, but executing a brother, that was something else.

"You gonna be." She whispered as her head moved, before he closed his eyes and relished the feeling of her lips at his temple, placing a small kiss to the fresh shaved skin.

She was licking his wounds like a lioness after her lion came back from a battle...and kissing her seemed to be a pretty good idea right in this moment. Though, he knew that idea wasn't the best he ever got. But it was one he'd gotten so many times without complying yet, it became harder to resist every goddamn time.

Happy had managed to not get in situation like that with her for such a long time. Avoiding the moment that threatened to take away all the control he was able to keep around her. Control that was necessary to prevent something important from destruction.

Usually he wasn't much of a thinker when it came to women. If he wanted one, he just got her or at least tried, without thinking a lot about the consequences. That had once brought him a black eye from an angry husband, but other than that, it usually wasn't that big at all. But with her, there was too much to be ruined with just one wrong move. It wasn't her brother though. That guy would've been overly happy and literally waited for it to happen. Tig probably was already planning the fucking wedding. But Happy didn't want that. He didn't want to lose such a good friend that meant so much to him, because his ability to maintain a relationship got somewhat lost without trace. It probably stuck somewhere in the traffic on an educational trip between _Hustler_ and _Penthouse_.

Friendships between women and men were difficult; he'd heard about that rumor, but found himself struggling when it came to believe it. His mind changed though, and his credits to those words grew when he'd realized the little girl who had once loved him for just giving her pen and paper, slowly grew into a decent woman that became more and more dominated from an increasing wisdom. It wasn't just once he'd caught himself, going to her for advice, talking to her like to an actual woman. She'd helped him a lot, she still did, mainly when it came down to the private side of business.

There were other thing, challenging his self-control. Things like comprehension and similarities, which was the result of common features which weren't to underestimate. And of course, with her mind and personality growing, her transformation wasn't meant to be unnoticed. The once small and skinny girl, with that dark hair that was cut short, had grown into an average sized beauty, with curves were they had to be and a thick mane that was long enough to reach the middle of her back, dyed in a warm blonde, so that her reflection wouldn't remind her of her mother anymore. Big and deep blue eyes, smooth lips, while she fortunately didn't get that big-ass schnozzle her brother used to call his nose. Though Happy wasn't sure if it just wasn't broken as many times as Tigs.

There was ink to find all over her body. She'd started that when she turned sixteen, to cover up the scars she'd gotten throughout her youth. An idea that turned into sort of an addiction, now giving her a full-sleeve on both arms, a stunning backpiece after she'd finally found someone on the east-coast who was able to cover the scar-tissue neatly. There were colorful pictures sporadically on her thighs and lower legs, the initials of her brother on her wrist, along the date he'd managed to get her out of that hell they'd called home for too long. It was like a second birth to her, she'd told him.

He always had a thing for women that were into ink the way he was, but knowing the meaning behind every goddamn tattoo was something different. Like that ridiculous Winnie The Pooh on her forearm. There were too many people asking her why she'd gotten that stupid thing and she rarely told them, that beside her brother, it was the only thing which was giving her a reason to laugh when she was a kid. The world she fled into, whenever hell broke loose at home. That damn movie even got Tig a stupid nickname, he yet insisted to keep, even around the club, just because it came from her.

All those things made it hard to resist his desires, especially when they came into situations like that. And her obvious attraction to him didn't make it easier.

"Hey." Though her small voice snapped him back to reality again, his name coming out of her barely above a whisper before he realized his lips were betraying his mind, placing barely sensible kisses to her neck.

He was aware that he should've pulled away from her, thinking about dinner or whatever was distracting enough. But instead of that, he just drew her closer until her back was literally pressed against his chest.

This was stupid. This was a stupid idea. She'd given him enough reasons to be certain of that and yet, it felt too good to pull away. He didn't want to let go of her.

"Stay the night with me." He said lowly, closing his eyes by the missing answer, placing another kiss to her jaw. "Just want you next to me."…

* * *

**_Sixteen years earlier…_**

It was a rainy day. One of those days Tacoma was known for. Dark clouds hanging deep, giving the city a dark aura while dampening the streets without mercy. There wasn't much to do on a day-off, without a lot of friends outside the club which was hanging low after a big party the night before.

Happy had cleaned the clubhouse, restocked all the supplies that were needed for the next event or days and finally he found himself at one of the tables, sketchbook and pencil in hand, trying to get his next idea done. It was meant to hit his skin the day he got his full-patch. A dream that was far away with more than at least ten months of prospecting. But he was sure he would succeed. He wasn't known for giving up on shit.

There was a sniffing nose getting his attention, causing him to look up from his artwork, noticing a little girl in front of him. Considering her size and appearance, she couldn't be much older than nine, maybe ten. Her dark-brown hair were frizzy and barely reached her chin. She was quiet though, looking down at his sketchbook before her eyes moved up to meet his own sort of coyly.

"Hi!" He said at the lack of anything better to say, getting a studying look in response, along some uncertain curling lips, but nothing else.

Her eyes went back to his drawing, her small hands reaching for it before caressing the outlines a little too gently. As if she knew, too much pressure was able to damage it.

She took her time to examine it neatly, eventually looking over at him again. And then she turned around and left. Running up the stairs she disappeared and left him behind with a confused look on his face.

"She's not talking to strangers." The queen's voice snapped him out of it though, making him look over at her with a nod in understanding.

"Who is she?" He asked, finally brave enough to do something bold like that after he'd spent almost six weeks with being scared of Lee kicking him out for just looking at her.

A warm smile hit her face, before she answered in a low voice; "Alex."

It was one of those 'ooh'-moments, as if his brain was a light that got switched on. He'd heard about the girl, mainly from Tig himself, that guy who'd moved heaven and hell to get her out of the parents household almost six months previous. Knowing a bit about Tig's youth, Happy easily understood his reasons for that move.

Though Happy was a bit confused when Tig called her Alex, knowing he was known under that name too. But he'd explained quickly, their parents weren't just violent and aggressive fuckers, but also didn't give any fucks about their kids and didn't even bothered to get another name for her out of their fucked up junkie-brains, since she was nothing but an accident.

"_Gonna give her a full name for her birthday." _Tig had explained, a smile spread across his face. "_Thought about Alexis…Like that she can still be Alex, so she won't be confused or mess it up…Alexandra would work too, but it's too similar to mine, I want her to have something to difference herself, something feminine. She tried for too long to be a damn boy…I mean, nothing wrong with that, but she isn't really thinking she's a boy, she was just trying to protect herself."_

Happy hadn't understood what Tig meant with the whole boy-thing, he still didn't, but he wasn't stupid enough to ask. And he wasn't able to think about that further, as she suddenly jumped down the stairs again, coming to a halt in front of the table, a pile of loose papers in hand as well as a pencil-case. He smiled, though he looked over at Samy for permission, but finally pulled back one of the chairs, offering her a seat next to him.

Taking it hesitantly she eventually sat down, starting to sort the loose papers, before finding what she obviously was looking for. She stared at it for a second, or maybe two, but then leaned forward and began to continue her own drawing, biting her lower lip in concentration.

. . . . . . .

After spending some time in silence she suddenly stopped, looking at his hand for a while before finally reaching over. Happy was confused at first, but then felt the itchy feeling of twitching away, as the tip of her index-finger grazed the little round scar he'd gotten between thumb and forefinger. Because his father thought it was a good way to make a real man out of him by putting out a smoke on his skin.

She looked up at him sort of sad, a little angry too and suddenly she reached for her sleeve, pulling it up slowly. And he frowned when she pointed to a matching scar beneath the crook of her arm. There was a sick feeling hitting his throat, thinking about himself getting that shit when he was fifteen. He at least was old enough to get over the pain somehow, while she was barely twelve when Tig had made it to get her out of there and that scar seemed to be pretty old. So how old had she been when this happened to her?

While he thought about that, a smile came to her face before she reached into her case, pulling out a felt-pen. She opened it slowly and grasped for his hand hesitantly but finally drew a smiley-face across the cicatrized skin. She then continued with her own, giving him a soft smile which he returned ever so slightly, before she went back to her surprisingly skilled drawing.

. . . . . . .

"She's been doing that since she moved in with me…tries to cover it up with something that's telling her it's over and won't happen again." Tig told him later, after confirming his assumption how she'd gotten the scar, giving the little smiley-face a whole new meaning, before calling her down to get home.

After jumping down the stairs she stopped in front of them, handing Happy a paper sort of hesitantly. He took it, getting a shy smile from her, just before she took off in Samy's direction to get her stuff.

Unfolding the paper he couldn't help a smile coming to his lips. There was a sketch of his bike, a surprisingly detailed and good sketch of his bike, especially for a twelve year old girl.

"Guess you got a new friend, prospect." Tig commented, slapping him on the back and putting two fingers into his mouth to whistle for the German Shepard puppy, who came running immediately, followed by jumping, dark-haired squirrel that was struggling to hold the leash, before Happy heard her voice for the first time, calling out loudly;

"Missy!"


	3. Awkward

First of all I want to thank you guys. I'm absolutely thrilled about all the follows and likes and reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the first one and please keep going and tell me what you think! :-)

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

Her chest rose and fell heavily. Her skin was smothered with a light haze of sweat. The deep surrounding silence was broken from nothing but heavy breathing, which came out of her more and more stertorous as a big hand encircled her throat, applying slight pressure.

He held her in place, her back against his chest, the back of her head resting against his shoulders while his mouth sucked at her neck, nibbling and biting.

A little whimper escaped her mouth as his left hand cupped her breast, starting to knead it roughly while his thumb brushed across a soft nipple contrary gentle and smooth.

"Missed you." And there were goosebumps rising into her skin when his voice sounded raspy and low against her neck before he let go of her throat, cupping her chin, moving her head, so that he could pull her into a fierce kiss that was filled with hunger.

Meanwhile his hand left her breast and made its way down slowly, with feathery fingertips that were caressing down her stomach until he reached her core.

She shuddered in anticipation and broke the kiss when a small sigh escaped her lips, followed by him growling lowly as his fingertips stroke the sensitive spot between her folds.

He didn't let go of her when he pushed her forward until she reached the dresser in front of her. And she was just about to bend down, when he turned her around and his lips were on hers in an instant.

His hands came to her hips, lifting her off the floor and sitting her down onto the dresser before he broke the kiss and bent her legs up, spreading them widely.

His eyes were dark, his continuous stare intense, his expression aggressive but filled with desire as he entered her slowly before he watched himself sliding in and out of her with a craving look she hadn't ever seen in all the time that she knew him..

His thrusts were deep, and hard, partly slow and shallow. The ongoing changing pace was causing her mind to stop working and made low mews turn into loud moans quickly. It felt like an engine was pumping anger through his body at irregular intervals, before it hit his center and made her scream.

The second he hit that one damn spot she'd only heard about yet, she arched her back and dug her nails into his skin, getting a grunt in response, filled with pleasure.

And she began to cry out loud when he suddenly started to drill into her, tantalizing that very spot over and over like a pneumatic-driven lunatic, while his thumb rubbed her clit roughly and caused her to scream at the top of her lungs.

He was making her lose her fucking mind.

Alex wasn't used to letting go completely. She wasn't used to not giving a fuck about all the noises coming out of her; about her physical appearance. Usually she was way too busy with being all sexy and putting up whatever fucking show for the man in front of her. But she dared to think she'd just never met the right man who was able to make her forget about all of that. For sure she didn't, given by the fact that Happy was able to make her forget her own goddamn name with an easiness that not even the holy Father was showing while he was praying the goddamn Hail Mary.

The dresser she sat on bumped into the wall continuously and objects were hitting the floor; loud and roughly. But all she was able to do was let her head fall back, her lips spread open, cries coming out of her, while her eyes seemed to roll into the back of her head.

Suddenly his movements stilled and her screams died down as she looked up at him, breathing heavy and fast, her thighs twitching, her body trembling.

She saw the spark of a pleased smirk coming to his lips before he bent down, attacking her mouth with his own all over again. An aggressive kiss that was hungry and hard, full of desire she'd never felt before.

His muscles were flexing beneath her fingertips, his breath brushing her skin slightly while he began to move his hips again; slowly.

But it didn't take long before he left her lips and buried his face into the crook of her neck, as she suddenly heard moans coming out of him.

They weren't the type of moans men used to let out during sex while trying to prove their non-existing virility. They were intense and loud moans, deep and raspy, almost sounding agonized, joining the twitching length inside of her before everything went still…

* * *

…Alex literally jumped up into a sitting position, her heart beating rapidly within her chest as if she was trying to win a marathon. She felt sweaty and exhausted, her mind racing a million miles, her eyes wide open, staring into the slowly illuminating room, while she frantically tried to catch her breath. Usually when she woke up like that, she was suffering the aftermath of a goddamn nightmare. But this wasn't a nightmare, this was…yeah.

It wasn't new to her though. She was hunted by those dreams since that day she'd caught Happy with Jen. That one sweetbutt Alex herself wanted to do some dirty things with. She hadn't though, not yet at least.

Jen was tall and pretty and well-built, with firm tits that were as big as a pillow, hips that were meant to be grabbed, a round ass that begged to be slapped. Watching that girl scream while she got fucked by a man Alex wanted to feel so badly in every imaginable position? That was something she wasn't able to forget about. The way he touched her, the way he kissed her, the way he thrusted into her…Jesus fucking Christ.

Happy still didn't know that she'd watched him and she sure as shit wasn't about to tell him. And she knew she was supposed to be annoyed or hurt or whatever negative feeling was normal in this kinda situation, but she wasn't. This was hot shit, and she'd rather be turned on. Feeling as if she was some burning torch, squeezing her legs together as a growing heat at her center began to dampen her panties. So she ended up in her bed, playing memory-driven with herself for half of the goddamn night, jumping over the edge intensely...multiple times.

It had to be what happened in the spare-room the night before, because usually she did not have those dreams while she slept beside him. This was something new, though they'd shared a bed before. Although she didn't know why. They sure weren't made to do that.

Even though Happy wasn't much of a snoring person, he damn sure wasn't some quiet mouse either. He had this nerve busting habit to lean his head back into his neck with parted lips, so that his breathing was unbelievable loud and definitely not to be ignored. And if he didn't, his presence still wasn't to be missed. She even could tell if he was sleeping, dozing or awake; his breathing changed with all of those states. Not that she had any rights to complain. Other than him, depending on her position, she did snore sometimes — an ugly remnant of a broken nose from a bitchfight seven years ago.

They sure shouldn't have slept next to each other, but they still did sometimes. Mostly after a movie or after talking for an eternity, cuddled up light fucking teddy-bears. Then he used to have his left arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her back against his chest, while he always managed to somehow steal the goddamn blanket from her. Alex was sure, Happy was the reason for at least two flu's that were tantalizing her for almost a week throughout the years.

Said arm now laid across her lap, suddenly moving around her hips before he lazily tried to tug her down again.

"Since when do you moan while you sleep?" He mumbled with a hoarse and sleepy voice, causing her eyes to widen even more.

This was weird.

"Nightmare." She stated, taking a deep breath. But this wasn't a nightmare and his hand felt like fire around her hips and she didn't want to lay down beside him anymore; she was sure she would do something stupid. Like grabbing his dick and shoving it up her pussy without thinking about the consequences. Though she couldn't just go and sleep in the spare-room. She never slept there and why would she consider it after a nightmare?

And the last relaxation was gone when she felt and heard him chuckle behind her.

"Nightmare, huh?"

Well, fuck, this was… "Gonna tell me who the lucky one was?"… Forget weird, this was painfully awkward and embarrassing. What was she supposed to say? '_You!'_?

No, that wasn't going to happen. She could've come up with whatever fucking name. Like Donald, or Ronald, or Thomas, or Mickey…no, not Mickey, that was stupid; "Jen." but of course she chose the first name popping up in her mind, what happened to be the most stupid thing she could've answered at all. And this low growl that was escaping him confirmed her quickly.

"Would kill to share that dream." He then said and Alex squeezed her eyes shut. Of course he did, he loved Jen. Well, actually he loved her tits and those mind-blowing skills when it came to sucking dick. And Alex knew, he wasn't adversed from her too; watching them both doing the dirty dance, that probably would've been the ultimate scene for him.

When he tried once more to pull her down, he succeeded and finally she found herself on her back.

"Hope I was joining." He then said bluntly, causing her heart to skip a beat. This was so weird. Even for them, this was so unbelievable weird. And before she was able to come up with whatever goddamn answer, she already saw an impertinent and knowing smirk coming to his lips.

Of course he knew. He always knew everything. Sometimes it felt as if he could read her mind. He probably also knew that Jen wasn't even there. And if he didn't know, he definitely was assuming.

"You done embarrassing me?" She snapped, wiggling her ass slightly in an attempt to slide away from him. His arm still felt like fire and his teasing tone and face wasn't helping the slightest to turn her off.

"Nothing embarrassing about that…" He retorted and trailed off while pulling her closer again, tugging the blanket across her body before he went on lazily; "Can't count how many times I woke up with filthy shorts because of you."

This was bold, and blunt…but it was all Happy and for whatever reason made her feel less stupid somehow. Although she wasn't sure what made her feel stupid in the first place; why she was feeling so embarrassed at all. She actually wasn't much of a shy person; how could she be? And there weren't many moments she felt embarrassed around him anymore; not after he'd caught her ransacking his porn-collection when she was fifteen. Back then she was so preoccupied with trying to figure out if the covers were grossing her out or turning her on, that she hadn't even heard him until someone was clearing his throat. She'd then jumped in shock and spun around, just to find her brother and Happy leaning in the doorway, looking at her a little dumbfounded…and smirking. As if they weren't sure if it was better to be amused or confused. Well, she couldn't blame then. Until then, she more or less was something like a 'Yuck!'-person when it came to sex and was the last person that would've searched through one hell of a porn-collection.

Happy did have a lot of those and nowadays Alex knew all of them. Probably because she now was almost 29 and wasn't much of a 'Yuck'-person anymore. Actually she really had a thing for good sex. Forget that, she absolutely loved it. And this brought her back to reality, where she felt the heavy urge to wiggle away again. Because that calloused thumb brushing across her hips simply drove her nuts.

"Maybe we should drop that farce and just do it." She heard herself speak before her brain was able to work out those words. But for whatever reason she didn't give a fuck, what probably was the reason for her dry voice. The embarrassment seemed to be gone now and all that was left behind was an incredible tiredness which regards to their never-ending venture to avoid the inevitable. They both knew, at one point, they would end up naked and sweaty. Everybody knew. And sometimes she forgot about the reason why they shouldn't. Now, seemed to be one of those moments.

"Gonna talk about that again…when you aren't manipulated from a damp stain in your panties." He retorted, letting out an overly melodramatic sigh while pulling her closer and she chuckled lowly against his chest, as he… "Jesus…never thought I'd ever say something like that."

* * *

The morning after was awkward. When Happy woke up, Alex was already out of the bed, and out of the house he later realized. She'd left him a note, that she was going to do some errands for lunch and then he found himself in front of her new cupboard.

He was still busy when she came home and started cooking and when he was done, she was busy herself.

They didn't talk about it. Not about what happened in the spare-room and not about the early morning.

It always was like this.

Once they'd lost it completely and even got to the point where they made out like horny teenagers. But he barely remembered that night, and neither did she. Drowned in too much whisky and tequila, it was just glimpses of pictures that seemed to be more of a blurred fantasy. But it wasn't fantasy; the pieces of clothes that were thrown all over the floor in front of the bed were a good indicator, telling them this really happened. The bite-mark on his neck was another one, just like her almost naked appearance next to his nothing but boxer-clad body.

They'd stopped though. Somehow they'd managed to stop before touchdown, although he wasn't sure how they made it. He wasn't even sure about it at all, until he was done with searching the whole room for a used condom, while she was looking for any sign of a forgotten one. Both of them came back with nothing and after that, they went for breakfast…and didn't talked about it again.

It was just how it worked. Being quiet seemed to make it so much easier, no matter how far they went. As if they were trying to avoid the point where it became reality. Because reality was nothing but an aggressive and violent bitch which caused regret and sorrow. And both was the reason for so much hatred in the world. They weren't single because they'd never had a relationship and those relationships were over for a reason. And these days neither Alex nor him were talking to their former partners anymore.

Alex didn't want to reach that point, not with him and Happy didn't either, not with her, while both knew talking probably would've led them there.

So sometimes they maybe forget about all restraints and acted easy around each other if they weren't there. But afterwards, despite all the thoughts about each other, all they felt was awkward.

"You gonna ride down to Charming with me next week?" They ate quietly together until he found a topic to break that weird silence. Because although he was somewhat used to it in the meantime, he didn't like it.

"Guess I'll just give you his present." She replied after chewing and swallowing a bite with a sip of the coke that stood to her right. And he stopped his fork midways, lowering it slowly while he looked at her seriously.

"Hey…don't allow her to get between you two." He then said, but the nasty look she was shooting him was a dangerous one, telling him it was a bold move to even insinuate something stupid like that. But he'd expected her to do that. "Nothing gets between me and my brother." Because she was right and he knew about that.

"You not showing up at his 40th birthday is someone getting between you and him, Alex." Though he still had to manage and get her sweet ass on the back of his bike to make a twelve-hour ride down to California. Because it was wrong for her to stay home, and because Tig had literally begged him to. The Redwood Sergeant knew, if there was one person succeeding on that mission, it was Happy.

After swallowing the next bite, Alex took a huge breath and let it out in a heavy sigh while running a hand across her head, tugging back some disturbing streaks of hair.

"It's not that…I just…don't wanna ruin it." She then said sort of capitulating, shaking her head to herself while sticking the fork back into the delicious miracle that she called lasagna.

She really was a great cook, started to teach herself the second she stepped a foot into a kitchen that was an actual usable one. And after adding a few tips and tricks from Samy and Nessi, she nowadays was sending his fast food infested stomach on culinary trips to heaven in an increasing regularity. Maybe it was that, that was causing all the trouble; He remembered his mom used to say: '_The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.' _But his mom used to say a lot of things he didn't believe in, so he just dropped the thoughts, looking at Alex with a cocked brow.

"And how would you do that?"

Putting the fork down onto the empty plate, she finally leaned back, taking another sip of coke while obviously relishing her pigged out belly, allowing another sigh to escape her lips with an surrendering expression on her faith.

"Well, I guess Tig wouldn't mind some bloody brawl on his day, but…something tells me he isn't eager to see a bitchfight between me and his President's…woman."

Happy smirked. Though he knew he shouldn't have done that, because this was serious. But he couldn't help it by her struggling effort to be somewhat respectful instead of just calling her bitch or worse.

"You'll make it without one." He said, not really convinced about that himself.

Alex didn't like Gemma — scratch that; Alex absolutely hated Gemma Teller. Those two never got along well with each other and Happy knew it wasn't because Jax was dragged out of his bedroom by his ears from Tig, after her brother had caught the nowadays VP in his attempt to pop her cherry almost thirteen years ago.

"I'm done with holding back, Hap. It would end just like it did the last time and…geez, she's just…I can't stand that disrespecting, arrogant, snappish…whatever." Shaking her head she emptied her glass. "It's better I just stay here. It'll spare us the nasty bullshit." And with that, she rose to her feet and went to the sink to rinse the plate before putting it into the dishwasher beneath.

The reason for the missing love between those two was simple. Gemma was an alpha-woman, used to boss around others without complains. And Alex, she was an alpha too. She was surrounded by those women and made it to real friendships with a lot of them. Jesus, Samy was some sort of mix between a mother and best friend to her. So women like that weren't compelled to hate each other, but they did when one of them thought she could dominate the other one. And that was exactly what Gemma tried for too long now.

Alex had made it to go with it for years though, holding back a lot since she was very aware and didn't forget about the hierarchy. She'd tried to think it was only days to master, but the never ending imperiousness of Redwoods Queen left behind a bitter taste. At one point Alex was just done with swallowing the disgust that was sickening her stomach. And eventually it became an enormous accumulation of noxious poison she now was unable to not spit into the Queens face. It was what happened just a few month previous. When Happy brought her to Charming after Tig had been taken. With the pressure and worry getting the better out of her, Alex had just snapped and then all hell broke loose, ending with both women being at each other's throat violently and bloody. And it didn't stop until Happy and Clay managed to drag them apart, struggling hard with pulling both women in different directions of the property to cool off.

And there he was, the Redwood President, being stuck in a fucking dilemma. There was his wife, the most precious thing to him and then there was Alex, the woman that meant the world to his Sergeant, who again was a very important member of SAMCRO. So what was he supposed to do?

"Clay talked to her…she'll watch it around you."

Standing up Happy followed her to the sink, coming to a halt beside her to do the same as she did just seconds ago.

"It's bitches business…why would he care?" But Alex didn't bother with looking at him while she spoke, putting the leftovers into boxes for the fridge or him to take home.

"Guess, Tig made it unmistakably clear what comes first." And she shrugged, shaking her head slightly, "Club comes first." before she went to the fridge.

"The club is more than just Redwood, Alex."

They fell in silence after that, both busying themselves with taking care of what was left of the mess around the kitchen, before she finally spoke up again; "He loves Charming."

And Happy grabbed the back of her head and then placed a kiss to her forehead, finally feeling as if they were back at their usual conduct again; "He loves you more."

* * *

Thanks for reading :-)

I'm not sure when I'll be able to post again. I have to wait for my beta until she got time to edit my next chapter. But hopefully it's out by the end of the month.

**valeriecavin87** \- Thank you!

**Ks** \- Thank you! I hope you enjoyed this chapter too, tell me what you think :-)

**eva .duce. 1** \- Thank you! It means a lot!

**Guest** \- Thank you for reading and reviewing!

**ReadtoRelax** \- I'm happy to see you here too :) Yeah, they know each other pretty well, but I doubt it's just that simple for Happy...or both of them :D

**I-am-sarah123** \- I'm glad that you like story as well. I think I'll continue with both, though I don't know how often the past will come up.


	4. Baby Lion

Thanks for all the reviews, follows and favs again, you can't imagine how much it means to me.

And now I hope you all enjoy the new chapter.

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

_8 years earlier..._

The water was pattering down onto his tired body and made Happy forget about the exhaustive shit he'd done during the day. Although it was pretty impossible to forget about this kinda stuff, a good, long shower was helping to at least bury the memories somewhere deep in his fucked up mind. Deep enough, so that they usually never made an appearance again.

Not that he was known for having any second thoughts about his own deeds, or for having a conscience. Though it was better for it to rot away somewhere deep in his mind, so it would never come up again, causing doubts or trouble.

Some people called him sick, others disturbed. Again many just called him psycho, but for the most he was just known as Killer. It was simple, if not to say moronic, but it got unmistakably straight to the point.

Most people kept their distance anyway. Obviously there was some sort of a protective mechanism that told them it wasn't the best idea to get in contact with him. Happy didn't give a shit though. He wasn't much of a nice guy. He neither tended to be sweet, nor did he feel the need to get himself a lot of friends; not outside the club. The guys loved him for what he was and that was enough. He had the Sons, he didn't need anyone else.

But there was Lucy. Or Luna. Or Lulu. He'd forgotten her name as soon as she'd told him. It wasn't anything special. Just like the whole damn girl wasn't anything special. She was pretty, somehow. She was slender, had a nice pair of tits and a good ass. Anything else wasn't interesting to him. It wasn't like he planned to fuck her a second time. Hell, he didn't even want to talk to her a second time — actually, he didn't want to talk to her at all.

However, the girl, let's call her Lu, obviously didn't have any sort of protective mechanism. She'd thrown herself at him when he'd barely left the chapel.

She went home with him. Without wasting a second thought, she get on his bike and drove off with him, as if she'd hit the jackpot. This kind of honor wasn't given to many of them..

She probably was already dreaming about their wedding, where he would walk her down the aisle, making her his Old Lady.

But that wasn't what he'd planned to happen. He fucked them and kicked them out. If he was at their place, he took off as soon as he was done. Sometimes he would spend some nice time with them afterwards. But that was it.

Lu for sure wasn't about to change that. She was a simple minded girl, still a bit green. She was in her mid-twenties and an idiot. She was just like all of them; usable and fun. They were part of the life like the Harleys and the whiskey. But also like a useless bike or empty bottle, they also were replaceable — nothing special.

He snatched a towel from the rack at the wall and wrapped it around his hip. One look in the mirror told him, there nothing had changed. He looked like he did in the morning; beside that little scar above his eyebrow — that son of a bitch had some fun, confidently hitting his head. After that, Happy had some fun too — with a pretty knife and that fucker's throat.

The only existing evidence for that diversion laid beside him on the floor. There was a little bloodstain that made its way to his wife beater.

He snatched his shirt up, along with a lighter from the little cupboard to his left and made the little red spot disappear. Only then did he throw it into the garbage can and let the lid slam shut with a loud bang.

In the bedroom he pulled some random sweatpants over some random boxer-shorts and chose some random wifebeater to slide it down his torso. He didn't feel the need to dress up properly. He didn't need to. Those girls threw themselves at his feet. He barely set a foot into the clubhouse and they treated him as if he was the holy Messiah, although he wasn't giving them the honor to be treated just as royalty. It was just ridiculous and bleak, if not to say boring.

Finally he grabbed the condoms and made his way into the living room.

Lu sat on the couch and looked at him coyly. She was chewing her bottom lip shyly and obviously didn't know what else to do.

He wasn't surprised though. There wasn't any precedence those girls could've talked about. She was the first one that made it here and he was sure, she was the last.

Weaponed with whisky and smokes he took a seat next to her and gave her a nice fake-smile. She seemed to be a little nervous, so maybe it kicked in now, that protective mechanism.

Or it didn't.

"C'mere." He said raspy and low, letting a little of the burning liquid running down his throat.

And Lu came closer, although she was sticking her hand between her legs which were pressed together tightly. What the fuck was her problem? If she was shy, then what the fuck was she doing at the clubhouse in the first place?

"I…I really like you." She said quietly and he felt the need to throw up immediately. She didn't know who he was. She just knew he was drinking too much on Friday nights and fucked too many groupies. She didn't know the slightest thing about who he was or what he was able to do. He was an asshole, most of the time and that was on purpose. He barely had a nice looks for those girls. But obviously it was exactly that dangerous one, which turned them on. Though, what the fuck did she like about him?

Inevitably he began to damn himself, while he couldn't help the question, what made him bring her here in the first place? But the answer wasn't hard to find. Samantha had prepared and cleaned up all the dorms for the expected visitors and she didn't want anyone to destroy her hard work. So out of fear she would rip off his balls, he regarded her wish and took Lu home with him, without thinking about it too much at all.

"Just one night, you know that, right?" He asked. Because he absolutely hated to give girls hope for something that wasn't there. They had to know what they were looking forward too. The chance was too big that they stuck to his ass afterwards if they didn't.

Lu nodded once, but her eyes were telling a different story. He would fuck her anyway. She would be enthralled and tell her friends about it. Then they would whisper and giggle and feast on the memory that weren't theirs.

He offered her something to drink which she declined with a thanks. She probably didn't like whisky or beer. But he didn't have any champagne or anything other girly-like in the house.

Though he really wished that she would take a drink. As stiff as she was in that moment, he could've begotten his damn mattress and wouldn't have felt the difference.

Placing one hand at the back of her neck he pulled her forward and kissed her. Usually he wasn't much of a kisser, but maybe it was doing the trick and ease the tension a little. Not unsuccessful, since the stiff board began to move a little.

From there it didn't take long until her head was his lap, the tip of his cock meeting the back of her throat. She choked and he grunted. He loved when they choked. It gave him this odd feeling of power. So he put pressure to the back of her head one more time before he let go of her.

She coughed when he pulled her back by her hair before she breathed heavily, gasping for air.

But then, she destroyed everything as she licked away the saliva that was caused by his actions and was now dripping from her lower lip before she swallowed it down eagerly, spoiling his mood.

She probably had never heard that sex wasn't some sweet fucked up cuddle-thing. It was dirty. It was brash, rough and vulgar, and one hell of a mess. And that was what it was supposed to be. At least if it was meant to please him. Because he was the epitome of primitive and kinky profanity. At least that's what Gina had told him. The only one that was brave enough to do that.

Lu wasn't like that. Lu was shy and looked forward to some sweet fucking cuddle-sex. She was so ordinary — really nothing fucking special.

And again there was the question: what was she doing with the Sons? But the more important question was: what was she doing with him? Although she may not knew how it looked at his place, she at least had heard from the girls what to expect, didn't she?

But the answer to that question was one he wasn't about to get…

…because the front-door sprung open and a blonde surfer stood in the threshold, looking at him keenly, watching the picture in front of him.

He was a good roommate. Tidy and trustworthy, as much as good company at otherwise boring nights. But in this moment Happy wanted to grab his throat and choke him.

However, he pulled Lu's head out of his lap completely and tried to cover what was there to be covered, while he looked questioning into his brother's eyes. Not that he was ashamed, but at one point of his life — no matter what other people thought — he did get some sense of modesty.

Kozik took a few seconds to calm down before he looked at the scene skeptically. She seemed to be sweet, you didn't expect that on her forehead you would find the words _Happy's prey_. She wasn't his kind of girl — way too cute, way too decent. Next to him she looked like she got lost somewhere. As if she was some innocent angel that ran into the devil's arms by accident after she was kicked out of heaven. But Happy didn't go for innocence. His brother was all about sin; tons of never ending sin. That blonde, cute thing definitely looked out of place.

The blonde Son threw his cut on top of the backrest of the second couch and sat down. After a lot of hard days he was exhausted. So he lit a smoke and took a long drag before blowing a thick cloud towards the ceiling.

He was annoying and Happy wanted to shackle, gag him and throw him into the closet.

It was masterful how his brother was able to destroy a situation that already was just half-pleasant to him.

He grumbled irritated and pushed Lu a little more off of him.

Why did he move in with him again? Oh yeah, that lovely money. The condition of his mother was taking the biggest of his savings and was eating up his health insurance. It also was nagging at his nerves without mercy and Kozik was the little gnawer chewing slowly with relish.

He loved his brother, for sure he did. But here and there he felt the heavy urge to drag him down the stairs and lock him into the non-existing basement. He could give Lu a lift down there too — after all, he already was flirting with her.

Happy barely was done with pushing Lu to the side when suddenly another figure appeared in the doorway of the still open door. So Kozik wasn't just letting insome fresh air. That would've been ridiculous anyway; in the end they at least had some windows. But when it came to him, Happy never was sure Kozik didn't forget about knick-knacks like that.

The surfer had a shit-eating grin on his face and winked her in. They obviously had a visitor.

Lu looked up at her kinda scared, while deep blue eyes were glancing down at her; in a critical sort of way, showing off some sneering arrogance. Not even twenty-one and she already stared the sweetbutt down like a pro. Happy was sure, one day, she would be one hell of an Old Lady. She was born to be the King's Queen.

By that time, all that was found in Lu's eyes was some dismay, together with a little jarred self-confidence. But she didn't say anything. She wouldn't do that. No little bunny was dumb enough to provoke a lioness.

Meanwhile Happy looked up at the newcomer with a cocked brow. Because no matter how dangerous for a little bunny, she still was just the baby-lion and he was the grown predator that knew, no matter how hard she tried to compete with him in all her cute baby-lion-manner, in the end it was the seasoned predator who always won.

"You better go." Kozik said, looking at Lu. He still was flirting with her and pointed towards the front door before he blinked with one eye auspiciously.

Lu nodded and gave him a little smile. She obviously really liked him too. But Happy didn't allow her to break his heart and just rolled his eyes, as she started to get dressed again. She then took her bag and stormed out of the apartment in one hell of a speed while Kozik stood up to leave them alone.

"You need to stop him, Happy, not tell him moving is the right fucking thing…it's not!"

Of course it was that, what else than Tig's plan to move down the west-coast could it have been?

"It is…he wants to be with his girls. That's a good thing, Alex."

"And what about me? I don't want to go there…I hate Cali and what am I supposed to do? Give up my life so that my brother can be happy with kids he'd seen...what? Twice a year until now?"

Struggling with his belt, Happy tried to cover himself neatly. She didn't need to know how he looked downstairs. Even though she already knew, because she had no problem walking into the bathroom uninvited while he was completely naked.

But still.

"You don't have to go anywhere…you stay at the house, I'll keep an eye on you and everything is fine."

"Yeah…Tig will be absolutely thrilled, considering that he didn't even want me to move out while he lived in the same city."

"He's good with that…already talked with him."

There was a long pause and she once again tried to stare him down. But he wasn't a groupie, he wasn't a bunny, so whatever she tried was in vain.

Finally she sighed deeply, then slumped down next to him, obviously not giving a shit that she'd destroyed whatever little bit of pleasure he was looking forward to this night.

"So, after cock-blocking me…you gonna tell me what happened to your nose?" There was a ring in her nose, in her septum to be exact, making her easily mistaken for a bull. But it somehow was fitting that strange style she'd found for herself around two years ago. On the other hand, it could be a good thing to hook a leash on.

The next thing he would make her explain were those way too short, high-waisted shorts she was wearing. What was she thinking, goddamnit? She wasn't a whore and she wasn't a groupie and for fuck's sake. She would never be any of that. Why did her brother ever allow her to leave the house like that?

* * *

Alexis did care a lot about her physical appearance. Happy couldn't remember one day throughout the last ten years when she hadn't taken a look into the mirror at least once before she left the house. Just to make sure she didn't look messy. Usually the look turned into at least five minutes, where she made sure her makeup was on point; where she gave her hair the final touch and adjusted her outfit. It was probably something that came with her job. A good appearance wasn't a bad thing, considering it was the first thing that got the clients attention.

Though Alex did a lot more than she actually had to, since she'd fallen in love with the rockabillies when she was eighteen.

The look was something strange though. A combination of innocence and cuteness with pure sexiness and sin, achieved by the use of blow-drys and polkadots.

Well, there were other things about it. Like bright red lipsticks and pumps whose heels were high enough to reach the universe. Old fashioned stockings and curve accentuating clothes that were pointing out all those body-parts that begged to be shown, mostly without showing them at all. Her long legs and smooth thighs, which actually looked like thighs and not like those rawboned stilts he was surrounded by in the clubhouse. An ass, that had gotten this perfect round shape throughout the years, now causing the most painful urges to just grab it. Curvy hips, a flat and defined stomach, framed from a small waist that led to a marvelous rack, which was giving her one pretty hot cleavage.

All those parts Happy craved to explore, with his eyes, his hands, his lips, his tongue, his...Jesus!

It was a strange look but Happy liked it, and he probably wasn't the only one. In the end, there had to be a reason for Betty Page being such a highly coveted woman back in the day.

Though, Happy still hadn't discovered how she managed to look just classy and sexy, instead of slutty, considering there were some days when she loved to show more skin than the sweetbutts did.

Most of the time Alex kept it subtle though. Discreet clothes like skinny jeans and simple shirts, tops or blouses, along a pretty belt and some matching pumps or chucks, so that it was just hair and makeup revealing some extravagance.

But sometimes — sometimes she did dress up from head to toes. Usually for one of those photo-shoots she used to do just for fun, because she absolutely loved it. On those days, she absolutely killed it and Happy threatened to die a bitter death by huge blood-loss. Caused by an explosion after every ounce of blood shot down into his crotch in no-time.

Disappearing into the dressing or bathroom for way too long, she then used to come out again, looking like a pin up that came straight out of the 50's.

It were those days he literally craved the opportunity to just grab and fuck her right at the spot, no matter where it was. Like in the bed, on the dining-table, the kitchen counter, the couch, the porch, the washer, or on the backseat of her beautiful 1950 De Ville. Behind the garden shed of her brother's house, the basement at Lee's, a storage room of the club, or against an appalling large trunk in a little piece of forest at the side of the highway a little outside of Fircrest.

Now, with all the love for clothes and style, Alex did have a huge space problem. Her closet started bursting at the seams years ago, which forced her to pick out the pieces she used to wear only once or twice a year and put them into boxes, so that she could store them in the attic. But, when a big event came up, she used to climb up the ladder and get something special and he wasn't surprised when she did exactly that the day before their take off to Charming. What he hadn't expected was to find her in the bedroom, all the boxes surrounding her, while whatever used to be in there seemed to be spread out across her bed. By the time he arrived, he found one hell of a mess and she stood in front of the bed, staring down onto the endless selection of clothes while grabbing her hair angrily and letting out a frustrated groan.

"Is this where you're gonna tell me you've got nothing to wear while you actually own enough to open up a fucking store?" He said, smirking in amusement and her eyes snapped at him, shooting him a look that could kill before she moved to stare at the piles of clothes again.

Actually, Alex didn't belong in the same category as those kind of girls. She wasn't complaining about missing outfits and she never needed a party as an excuse to get a new one. She just bought them when she felt like it, and like that she always had something to wear for just about every fucking occasion..

"I'm too fat." She stated simply, placing her index-finger in front of her pursed lips in a thinking kinda way and his eyes widened. Because she wasn't only not complaining about the loss of clothes, he also never heard her say something stupid like that. Probably because she knew that she was far away from being fat. Though, she really seemed to be pretty distressed, what he didn't understand why, but in the end she still was a woman, right? And with him being a man, he didn't have to understand her all the time. Human nature didn't expect that from him. But, he still felt the urge to say something to her bullshit statement, he just couldn't help it.

"You're not fat, Alex."

The second he spoke, she spun around and shot him another dangerous look, paired with a cocked brow.

"I didn't say I'm fat, I said I'm too fat…for this…nothing is fitting anymore." She said, slumping down onto the mattress with a capitulating sigh.

"So yes, now I'm gonna tell you I've nothing to wear! Not unless I'm losing some weight until the party. What, let's be serious, is not gonna happen!" She added angrily, grabbing her barely existing muffin top to squeeze it roughly and he couldn't help the chuckle coming out of him. This was ridiculous.

Though, he now was getting her problem, but he couldn't say he really was surprised. She was eating like a pig lately — her words, not his — and she definitely was too fucking lazy for regular workout. It had to happen one day, he just hadn't thought about it yet nor had he realized that she'd actually gained any goddamn weight. But with clothes that were fitting like a glove, there probably wasn't much needed to make them useless.

However, Alex seemed to be pretty angry or sad or whatever a girl was feeling in this kinda moments, although she wasn't one to be called an ordinary girl. Yet, Happy still didn't know what to do or say while he felt the heavy urge to just disappear. He was sure this was a conversation she was supposed to have with a best friend that was owning a pussy or tits…even better, both. But with neither Samy nor Nessi around, he seemed to be the one having it with her…but that didn't make it better…or make him feel any less uncomfortable…or give him any goddamn idea what to say. This wasn't his fucking territory, it definitely wasn't.

It was something he'd tried to avoid in whatever damn relationship he was in. Usually when he was around a girl that was whining about her figure, all he got when he looked at her naked body was a rock hard boner. He wasn't able to understand them and loved that Alex never did that, not yet at least, but there had to be a first time for everything, right?

"Just wear this…looks good." He said by the loss of something better, letting out a sigh, still not able to wrap his head around her problem. Not that he was a person that didn't give a fuck about his appearance. There was a reason why he used that razor regularly and it damn sure wasn't health consciousness and need to keep up his strength that made him workout steadily on those abs and biceps. But…he also wasn't doing it because a fucking shirt wasn't fitting. Then again it would've taken a lot of weight to make them not fit anymore.

"Queen Bee and her porn-star bitch will use whatever they can find to piss me off…so I'm not showing up at my brother's 40th birthday like this." She said, pointing along her shirt and skinny-jeans.

"It's just clothes, Alex."

"Yeah…and yet, she'll use it. She's searching like a fucking hawk to get anything to piss me off. She did that before, Happy."

There had been times Happy did regret the decision he made when Tig moved down to California. Times he regretted giving her the opportunity to stay. A lot of shit had happened to her because he wasn't as good at keeping an eye on her as he thought he would be. Shit he blamed on himself for years. Shit her brother blamed him for just as much. They had fought about it for months and the only reason they'd stopped was her screaming and yelling at them, telling them she couldn't stand when the two most important men in her live were fighting...about her. So they'd stopped and finally the guilt and blame slowly vanished. Partly because she told them it wasn't Happy's fault, it wasn't Tig's fault, it was just her, because she'd been dumb enough to be such a naive and stupid girl.

And in situations like that, whatever guilt was still left in him was gone, because in those moments he knew, if Tig would've taken her with him, she wouldn't have become the person she was today. Because she would've come back just days later, not that close to him and angry at her brother, and that would've led her in even worse shit than she'd already been in.

And whatever funny shit was there that made him laugh was gone when he saw the serious and distraught expression on her face now. He sort of got her point. It wasn't just about clothes. It was about the big picture. The whole big Alex and Gemma picture, created by an artist that still didn't know in which direction he wanted to go.

Happy made his way over to her and pushed some clothes aside before sitting down next to her. When she didn't react and went on with staring at the opposite wall, he placed his index-finger beneath her chin, forcing her to look at him.

"Doesn't fit you." He then said with a calm voice, allowing his thumb to caress her cheek gently.

"What?"

"Self-consciousness!"

"I'm not self-conscious…I just…I don't want them to piss me off, because if they do I know I'll just lose it. And I don't want that to happen. I don't want to ruin this and I don't want Tig to leave Charming. It's a pretty shitty town, but he loves it there." She said with a strange sort of anger in her voice and suddenly Happy didn't know if it was the right thing to tell her what Tig had said. But she would've known about that anyway, they didn't have secrets, they never had.

"I'm gonna be there too…I'll just put a leash around your neck and hold you back." He said smirking, getting a raised brow in response. But it fell again, a dirty grin coming to her lips, before she disappeared out of his sight, her lips suddenly dangerously close to his ear.

"If you ever put a leash around my neck, I'm pretty sure there's a lot of things you gonna do with it, but holding me back isn't one of them," she replied with a lascivious voice, causing a rumble deep down his throat.

"You're a dirty girl, Alexis Trager." He replied, taking the chance to be just as close to her neck, where he felt goosebumps rising when he spoke.

"You've no idea."

"I think I do."

"Yeah?…You gonna stay here?"

"Why? Wanna show me?"

Suddenly she pulled away, eliciting slight disappointment in him.

"Actually I need to sleep in the spare-room."

"You never sleep there."

"Unless my bed is full of useless clothes I'm too lazy to put away again."

Happy knew it was an excuse the second she called herself too lazy. Alex was a lot of things, but lazy wasn't one of them. Especially not when it came to cleaning up whatever mess she'd caused. Actually, she was just as much of a neat-freak as he was. It probably was just what happened to you when you grew up surrounded by nothing but disorder and chaos.

However, Happy was sure, leaving that mess behind would disrupt every second of sleep she tried to find during the night.

"What about we put that all away together and I'll just sleep here?" So he let her know that he'd seen through her, without actually calling her out on it, causing a little smile coming to her lips in an instant.

"Did you eat?" She then asked, changing the topic in a less skillful way, but he nodded anyway.

"Good…didn't find the time to cook."

Taking a red dress from beneath her she let out a heavy sigh, shaking her head slightly in disbelief.

"You gonna take me to workout?" And he chuckled.

"You're still one pretty hot bitch…you don't need workout."

"Guessing if I don't want to throw all of this away, I do." She retorted and the imagination of her at his side on a run or at the gym made him smirk widely in anticipation. This was gonna be fun, considering her stamina was pretty much non-existent.

"Did you just call me bitch?" And the smirk turned into nothing but a stupid grin, before she pinched his side multiple times, causing him to bark out a loud laughter.

"What about Queen Bee and her porn-star friend?" He finally asked and she shrugged.

"I'll just try and trust your ability to hold my leash."

* * *

Thanks for reading and let me know what you think :-)


	5. Changes

Thanks for all the follows, reviews and favs.

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

_Two years earlier…_

"_Three years, Alex…Three fucking years and now you decide to fucking tell me that?"_

It was almost dawn while Alex sat down onto the floor in her living room, just staring into the darkness with no intentions to move while the words that came out of Marc's mouth wouldn't leave her alone.

With her legs tucked up, she rested her forearms onto her knees, letting her hands hanging down unmoving and not bothering herself with turning on the lights.

"_I better go and get me a real woman, not a fucking cripple that pretends to be one!"_

His words made her go insane and snap, which again made her do awful things so she could try to ease her pain. But it didn't work. She didn't feel better. She didn't feel anything at all. She just felt numb and she wasn't able to do anything. She wasn't tired. She didn't feel pain. She wasn't even hungry like she always was. She just didn't feel shit, although she didn't know how long she was sitting there. It could've been minutes or hours or days, she actually completely lost track of time at one point. The only thing telling her it was a long-ass time was the sun rising again, slowly enlightening the room.

Looking around she noticed the result of what obviously was something like a meltdown. And she just closed her eyes, leaning her head against the wall behind, not feeling the need to do anything about it.

She hadn't expected him to be happy. She even expected him to leave her. But she damn sure hadn't expected he would spit words like that right into her face. Hearing those words alone made her sick. Hearing them from a man she loved for more than three years did nothing but rip out her heart. He could've taken a knife and drill it into her chest, that would've been less painful than feeling this.

And now here she was, sitting on the floor in a completely trashed place and watching how the sunlight started to illuminate the mess.

Although she was too busy studying the patterns of dried blood on her hands, she didn't miss the light coming from the front-door as it was opened slowly. But she couldn't find the courage to move her head to look who was disturbing her weird sort of a pity-party.

"Holy shit." Hearing that voice though reminded her that she wanted to talk to him after she missed his call. But she couldn't give a fuck as the lights were turned on, causing her to squeeze her eyes shut as a stinging pain hit the back of her head before she heard how he went over, crouching down in front of her.

"What the fuck happened?" He really seemed to worry, but she didn't feel anything other than that agonizing numbness getting the better of her.

But he wouldn't just let her be like this. She felt his hand at her chin, forcing her to look at him and she wasn't surprised to find a shocked expression on his face.

Alex swallowed hard, but held his gaze despite the sudden overwhelming tiredness within her eyes. She just wanted to close them and sleep forever. But the only thing her burning eyes were doing when she closed them was betraying her by letting out some tears she tried to hold back in vain.

"Talk to me." Happy said quietly as his thumb came up, wiping away the wetness from her cheeks, surprisingly gentle considering the serious undertone she'd noticed in his voice. But she didn't want to talk. She just wanted to be alone and not have to explain herself. And there had to be a lot of damn explaining since she'd never done something like this before.

"Please go."

Finally she made it to a few whispered words, though, she wasn't even feeling her lips' movements. And when she opened her eyes he looked at her somewhat doubtful while he wasn't hiding that leaving her wasn't an option.

"Who did that?" He then said quietly pointing around the room and she returned his gaze with a thoughtful one for a while, weighing her options.

Well, her going crazy and doing it on her own apparently wasn't the first thing coming to his mind, so she took a deep breath, leaning back again; "Me." While sounding nothing but exhausted.

Studying her for a while he didn't say one single word until he looked her over as much as he could in this position, before his eyes reached her hands again and he made a painful face, looking tightly at something she didn't even feel.

Drown in her own thoughts she hadn't noticed Happy had moved until he lifted her up from the floor carefully and silent.

And he carried her out of the living-room and went through the hall towards the bathroom, sitting her down onto the toilet-seat before he looked around, seeing the room wasn't in better condition than the rest of the house.

She watched him silently as he rubbed the back of his head, studying the mess. But suddenly his hand fell down before he began to search through the cabinets until he found what he obviously was looking for.

"Why are you here?" She finally asked quietly, although she didn't plan on it.

"Didn't answer your phone." He replied with a weird and soft voice she rarely heard from him.

And she just returned his gaze tiredly, just accepting his answer when she remembered slightly that she'd destroyed her phone too.

Walking over to her he crouched down, opening the first aid kit before he took out everything he needed and finally he began to clean her hands; "Gonna hurt." Again speaking with that gentle voice from before.

But she didn't feel much of it, rather watched quietly the concentrated expression spread across his face while he wiped the blood from her hands in a careful sort of way.

"Would you want to be with a woman like me?" She asked softly as he switched to her other hand, looking at her in a thoughtful way.

"What do you mean?" But he didn't stop when he spoke and continued until the blood was gone, leaving behind nothing but cuts and scratches.

"Would you want to be with a woman that can't give you a family?"

* * *

_Ten months earlier…_

The dim lit room was quiet, the eery surrounding silence disturbed by nothing but constantly breathing which was barely loud enough to be noticed a few feet away.

Alex didn't speak a word while she was doing her job. A job she'd taken over after wrapping one of those petite hands around his wrist, pulling him gently into the dorm at the end of the hallway. She'd then slammed the door shut, and had shoved him towards the end of the bed, pushing him down on it into a sitting position. The gentleness was gone, along the big respect she was showing for the winner in front of the others. To be seen was nothing but fury rushing through her veins; anger radiating off of her with every move she made.

Taking the first aid kit out of the drawer under the sink in the bathroom, she reappeared, taking a seat next to him. Happy was quiet and just watched her as she opened the little bag, spreading out all the supplies, looking for the ones she needed.

"A…" He barely made it to the first letter of her name; "Shut up." before she interrupted him hissingly, as if she was an angry cat that barely was able to control its scratching claws. He went with it though, doing what he was told, just letting out a frustrated sigh as she started to patch up his face.

"He had no right to fucking touch you." He eventually said in his defense, referring to an asshole that gained too much misplaced courage. This wasn't supposed to happen, not in this goddamn place. She'd earned too much respect to be treated like that. Flirting, well, he didn't like it, but was accepting it. Talking to her, maybe wrapping an arm around her shoulder when she was good with that, he would pretend not to see it; to be fine with it. But he wasn't good with some fucker, bold enough to place one of his filthy hands on her ass, fucking squeezing it.

"You know…I'm capable of defending myself." She said, cleaning his wounds just one at a time, her soft hands placing a band-aid onto his cheekbone.

Happy used to touch her like she was some fragile eggshell. Like she was going to break the moment he put too much pressure on her feminine frame. Despite the fact he'd seen her doing shit that doesn't get done by some piece of glass, he didn't change his mind about that. He just touched her soft and gentle. No matter what he might was able to do to human beings, he never touch her otherwise.

But he knew she wasn't that eggshell. He knew she was able to defend herself. He'd seen her doing it multiple times; "Then why didn't you?" So he asked the obvious, causing her to frown at him; "Fuck!" before he suddenly hissed, feeling a stinging pain when the gauze that was drown in disinfectant was pressed to his jaw, fiercely.

"Because there was his hand on my ass and the next second there was your fist in his face…when was I supposed to do that?" She growled in frustration before going on with what she was doing, fortunately a little more gently and kindly again.

They fell silent again while she went on with his face, taking care of every little cut and bruise he'd gotten from fists and rings.

Finally she put away the bloody gauze, pushing up his shirt before examining his ribs, pressing soft fingertips into it, concentrating highly on his reaction. She knew him too well; she knew he wasn't one to show pain easily. Although he knew riding with broken ribs wasn't funny, his ego didn't allow him to show any of the pain, no matter what. But there was no pain to hide, the skills of the asshole when it came to the ring where pathetic. So there were just her fingertips brushing across his skin gently in between.

Being done with that, she started to collect and get rid of the mess she'd caused on the bed, putting everything back into the kit and throwing away the used and bloody gauze.

He couldn't blame her for the anger. She didn't like those brawls. Years around the club and she still couldn't bear the sight of two people fighting while they loved each other. She didn't cheer. She wasn't proud. Alex absolutely hated it and still used to disappear and leave the place when it happened.

He hadn't even known how serious she was about that until he found her in a silent corner of a parking lot years ago, throwing up in an agonizing way after he'd gotten into the ring with her brother. So he tried to avoid it when she was around, just like Tig tried to do the same.

Today wasn't one of those days, though. Today he did climb into the ring to blow punches into a brothers face. Today his protectiveness was getting the better of him, causing him to intervene. He couldn't stand the thought of another asshole looking for the perfect girl, just to dump her, again. Again for the exact same reason. Just like it was twice during the past years. It had taken him months to pull her out of this depressed and self-doubting bullshit. This wasn't going to happen again. One day she wouldn't get out of it anymore.

Yet, he knew he shouldn't have done it this way.

"I know you don't like seeing that." He said and her eyes snapped at him, immediately.

"Not my damn problem."

"Then what is your damn problem?" Taking a deep breath she let it out in a heavy sigh, while running a hand across her head, tugging back whatever streaks of hair bothered her.

"This isn't you being protective. This Happy, is you being jealous…So what's gonna happen now? You beat up every guy that dares to look at me or touch me? What do you expect me to do? Live like a nun while watching you, sticking your dick into whatever is pink enough to be called pussy?…That's not gonna happen, Happy! As long as you're not sticking that dick into my, and only my pussy, I'm gonna flirt and fuck with whoever I want to. So shove those exorbitant double-standards up your macho-ass and live with it!"

Alex was livid and definitely the only woman that was allowed to talk to him like that, beside his mom. Probably the only woman that was brave enough to do so, beside his mom. But his mom didn't count since she was his mom and Alex, well, he didn't know anymore why or when she got permission to do that. Though, now he sat on the bed and looked at her sort of clueless. She did have a point, but he wasn't about to admit that. Yet, he knew she would go absolutely crazy on him if he kept going with that.

"What about a deal?" So he let out a deep breath, folding his hands between his knees, thinking about the only option coming to his mind that was preventing him from spending another night in a cell of the local police department, while some fucker spent the night in a hospital with a broken nose and two missing teeth.

Looking at him she gave him a serious and doubting expression, obviously not sure what she should think about this; "And what deal would that be?"

* * *

_Today…_

Something had changed during the past months. Even more after he came back from Vegas. Until now, whenever they'd reached a certain point, they somehow managed to get back to their usual routine. But this wasn't going to happen this time, Happy felt it.

It were the small things that changed. Like the itchy feeling he got when he touched her, not knowing if he went too far or not. Like the strange feeling of moving into unknown territory, waiting for her reaction kinda nervously. He hadn't thought that he would ever feel something like this with her, since they were so unbelievably close already. But they'd guided there relationship into such a weird direction. So maybe it was normal to feel this, although he was sure the last time he had those feeling was years ago; probably somewhere in his prospect-period or shortly after, where girls and dates still meant something to him. Where he still gave a shit about finding himself an Old Lady. It didn't take long for him to not be like that anymore. Old ladies were a good thing, but, with all the shit that was crashing down on him throughout the years, hadn't been his main-concern anymore. He'd been happy to still be on earth, after prison, after facing it multiple times, after being at the enemy's throat just as often. And now here he was, feeling what he hadn't felt forever, being hesitant about a damn touch like a lovestruck teenager.

However, he refused to talk about it, and he actually didn't want to change that. He somehow feared the moment she'd tell him that she wanted distance. And he didn't want that to happen, as hard as it was to admit it to himself, he fucking needed her. She just did too many things for him. Grounding him, caring for him, being just that one sweet, little thing he always could go to, he always could rely on.

Yet he knew, they had to talk. They had to change something. For fuck's sake, they had to figure something out. This wasn't going away like a fucking flu!

Laying down, Happy tried to relax his tired back as much as he could. On days like this he felt like an old man, knowing he was meant to be on his bike for hours the next day after one hell of a week. Usually he was excited about long runs, but after the last few months he really could use a break.

Pulling Alex further into his side, he moved his head to rest his chin on her forehead. He wasn't known for being much of a cuddler and he hadn't known himself that he still liked it. And he still didn't need it to be satisfied, but there was something about a person being so close to you. Fingernails raking across your chest, a steady heartbeat meeting your own. He had to admit it was soothing, in a way not a lot of shit was calming him down nowadays.

"How was the date?" He asked, remembering there was one the night before. He wasn't sure, just overheard Nessi talking about it, when Lisa had asked about her whereabouts.

Alex hadn't told him about it, which wasn't unexpected. She didn't talk about her dates anymore, just like she didn't flirt around him anymore. Just like he didn't do any of his extracurricular activities around her anymore too. It was how it worked, no incidents anymore after the last one ten months ago.

"You really wanna know about that?" She replied awkwardly, since she didn't talk about it, because there usually were only two ways to end; either naked or nothing and she knew he didn't feel easy about the first.

Happy felt something squeezing. He couldn't exactly describe it, but what came the closest was a hand wrapping itself around his entrails and twist them. Enough to cross his chest and reach his throat, making him slightly sick. He didn't like the idea of her fucking around, while she actually wasn't fucking around at all. She wasn't a whore, but she was a woman with needs that was single for more than two years now. And a woman like her wasn't good forever with only her fingers and that batterie driven longtime-relationship she called Max…from Maximus, that again referred to…yeah.

Despite the male name, Max was a metallic purple shining beauty with a dozen different levels to entertain its owner. Why he knew about that? Because he once got stupid and a little to nosy when she was out of the house. Now he regretted that shit, because ever since then he wasn't able to get rid of the picture in his head. The picture of her laying naked on her bed, her eyes closed, her lips parted, little moans escaping her, while her right hand held the vibrating miracle to her still unseen pussy, he imagined was nothing but unbelievably pretty and beautiful.

This was pure torture, but still nothing to be compared to the feeling he had when he thought about her being fucked by whatever asshole she'd met he didn't know.

"Yeah!" So yeah, he wanted to know. Although he wasn't sure if he was just some self-tormenting idiot or a selfish-obsessed asshole that didn't want her to meet said fucker again. And if it was the last, he wasn't sure if it was him being just overprotective or him being possessed of the neon-green devil whispering stupid bullshit into his ear. None of this was a good thing, but he still wanted to know.

"Good!" She then said and Happy felt the anger rumbling. That wasn't the answer he was looking forward to. A little more details wouldn't have been wrong.

"You gonna see him again?" That earned him a cocked brow, paired with a nasty look he barely was able to read when she looked up again.

"You gonna see Jen again?" And yet, he still understood. And once again they reached a point where he got the feeling of running against an undestroyable and thick wall.

It was always the same, sometimes he asked, then she asked the same and then they went quiet, and finally he went back to the girls and she went back to however was out there to please her. He still didn't like it. Even less during the past four months.

"No!" Her head spinning around she stared at him confused. He wasn't surprised though. He'd never said something like this. He changed the routine and she obviously needed a second to process it.

"No?" But the confusion vanished and got replaced by pure dumbness, while all he did was holding her perplexed gaze with serious confidence.

Jen wasn't her problem, he was aware of that. The problem might have been those double-standards, while Jen sure was some sort of a metaphorical figure for all those girls he used to hook up with. But he didn't care. He knew jealousy wasn't her problem either. She did have a lot of crazy rules for a man at her side, but keeping it in his pants wasn't one of them. Alex didn't believe in forced faithfulness. In her book she got nothing with a man who was frustrated or pissed or felt guilty around her all the time, just because she caged him. If he was faithful, she was happy about it, if he didn't, she could live with it. Yet, this pretty rational motto which was ensuring none of her relationships would ever go to shit because of pussy, clashed with what was the only thing that maybe was able to make her biggest wish become true.

"What are you doing?" She asked quietly, looking at him a little distraught while Happy was determined to go past that shit. Someone had to, otherwise they would never break through that fucking circle they went through all the fucking time for almost a year.

"Think about it…and then tell me if you still think we gonna fuck this up." He said, tugging away a few streaks of hair before leaning forward, placing a kiss to her forehead. And then he moved to turn off the light, letting her be with that, even though he knew, he just took away a lot of sleep from her.

"What if it doesn't work out?" She asked, her head snuggling into his chest further before he tightened his hold on her, drawing her even closer if possible.

"Then so be it." Her fingernails stopped their movements after he spoke and he felt how she took a deep breath, felt how she shook her head slightly.

"You love kids, Hap." But all he could do was grumbling lowly. He was tired of this. So unbelievably tired.

"And the only way for me having any of it is with the right woman. And if she can't give me that, I'm good with it."

It wasn't like she was completely unable to get pregnant. The chance to make it was just unbelievably small. The chance that she was able to keep it, even smaller. Yet he knew she wanted to try. But how was she able to try if she always had to wrap up her man's dick because he couldn't resist some temptation?

He could do that. He'd done it before. And he'd proven it to himself during the last two months…to his libido's sorrow, without having any fucking pussy at all…

* * *

There wasn't much Alex wouldn't have done to make her brother happy. So in the end, there wasn't much to the discussions and arguments about her driving down to Cali or not. It had just taken three calls from Tig and four pretty insistent sermons from Happy to finally make her agree, already looking forward to some pretty shitty days in little less nice Charming.

So after packing for perceived hours, she sighed heavily and sat down onto the bed behind her, right next to her bag that would travel with them in the van the prospect had to drive down to Cali.

She wasn't the only woman going with them, which was pretty much saving her day, since the guys didn't mind a 12 hour ride non-stop to Charming.

While Alex didn't mind a long ride either, 12 hours non-stop were definitely too long and nothing but torture. She wasn't used to this and neither was her ass, so she was glad that she wasn't the only one balloting for a break in Rogue River, Oregon for the night, where the local charter already made sure there were enough rooms for them in the motel nearby the clubhouse, just across the eponymic river.

Happy probably would've made this break anyway. If it wasn't for her ass, it would've been for his nerves, since she'd been all whiny and fussy, driving him absolutely nuts for days, after the last time he'd made her sit on a bike longer than eight hours. Back then she'd forced him to massage her forever, pretty aware that he got a huge space problem down his pants, since she wore nothing above her waistline while laying on her stomach, his hands busy with the muscles of her back.

Thinking about that, she had to suppress a satisfied moan. He really had some extraordinary skills when it came to a massage. Those strong and big hands were just…"You good?"

…Alex spun around when she heard his voice and found him behind her, kneeling in front of his bag that sat on the ground. He probably was looking for a shirt, after that way too long shower he'd taken until now. She hadn't heard him entering the room and now all she could do was to stare at him stupidly.

He really was one handsome guy in those low hanging jeans, with all those tat's covering most of his upper body, as much as those muscles flexing beneath them. Alex could still remember the time he used to be just slender with this wavy, black, thick mane he got rid of when he was going bald at the temples.

Happy could be pretty peacocky sometimes, not that she would've ever told him that.

Her eyes drifted down and found his ass, they lingered there for a while before she eyed him up again, stopping at his face where she found a smirk and a cocked brow, along with some amusement radiating off of him.

Shaking her head slightly, she turned away again and she squeezed her eyes shut, then there was a quiet chuckle behind her. This was stupid…and embarrassing…well, sort of.

"Mom called…would love to see you." Happy said, breaking this weird silence and she moved to face him again, knowing he still waited for her canceling this until she was on the back of his bike, since this really wasn't much of a funny trip for her. Yet, she still wasn't about to changing her plans. She could do this. Her brother would cry if she didn't. Not that Tig was much of a crying person, but sometimes…he did.

"Then we better go and see her, huh?" Remembering what had happened the last time they'd visited Cessi together, she knew where his look was coming from — hell, she wanted to give him the same, but she didn't and just smiled.

"Gotta get going." She finally said, taking her bag and dragging it out of the room.

They were meant to be at the clubhouse by noon, where the others were already waiting so that they could take off together. Before that, she would drive her truck there. Like that she could be sure her baby was safe while the hot rod sleeping in her garage didn't leave place for it and she could take with her as much clothes as she wanted without Happy fussing about the size of her bag not fitting on his bike.

However, first of all she had to get the bag into her truck and she stopped midway, standing up straight to ease the pain in her back while she was sure she'd left a drag-mark on her floor. She didn't struggle with a lot of the stereotypical things you hear about women. But when it came down to packing a damn bag, she fulfilled every single one with perfectionistic meticulosity.

Looking behind herself, she found Happy at the end of the hallway, looking at her highly amused with a shit eating grin that she wanted to wipe off of his face.

"You know…a gentleman would help." She said, pointing to her bag she assumed weighed at least twice as much as herself. But all she got was a smirk, along an amused snort.

"Guess a gentleman would also have a problem with a girl that's cussing worse than a sailor on a regular base."

Squeezing her eyes to dangerous slits she grumbled to herself, slumping down onto her bag stubbornly.

"That's what happens when you grow up with outlaw bikers and whores."

.

.

.

When they finally arrived at the clubhouse, Alex found all the bikes lined up, sparkling and shining overly clean in the sunlight, as the prospect made his way over to her car.

He was a pretty courteous guy and when he forgot about his manner, because he was too busy with staring at their VP's Old Lady's cleavage, Happy made him courteous again by kicking his ass into her direction forcefully, making her chuckle.

"You look gorgeous." He said the second she hopped out of the truck, causing her to raise a doubting brow. In her book she looked messy rather than gorgeous. She'd chosen a dark skinny jeans, medium high combat boots and a leather-jacket worn over a simple white tank-top. This wasn't quite what she called hot, but neither pumps or heels or wedges nor chucks were a good choice for such a long ride, so she went with it.

Watching the prospect unloading her luggage and carry it to the van, she debated about telling him too many flirtations towards anyone that owned two sets of lips could result in him having broken legs one day, especially when the owner was a member's Old Lady. Not that she owned that title, but Nessi did and Samy and Linda and Chrissy and…well, all those women he didn't hesitate to flirt with. But she decided that he had to figure that out himself and just gave him a last smile along a thanks before she headed for the clubhouses backdoor, where Happy was standing with Donut, enjoying a smoke and the sun.

It took her two hours before she squeezed Happy's side, telling him she needed a pee-break and she could literally feel the frustrated growl escaping him.

It was another break two hours later before they finally arrived in Rogue River after altogether six hours, Happy still cursing her bladder but Alex couldn't help it and didn't give a fuck. If he wanted her to drive with him instead of her car or a plane, he had to fucking live with it.

Alex tried to hide the heavy stiffness that was bothering her, which made her pretty much unable to get off the bike on her own. But she wasn't about to admit that, so she did it anyways and while Happy was able to walk like a fawn, Alex still felt the vibration rattling through her ass as she slumped down onto the bed in a sighing sort of way, after entering the room they had gotten together.

Talking about Fawn, she probably was about to meet her cute nieces, who really weren't cute at all anymore. First of all Dawn was the one Alex was barely able to stand. She was a damn brat, who didn't know how to appreciate the love of her father or what he did for her. Alex never told him though. Tig loved those girls and the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him..

She heard a chuckle behind her as she laid on her stomach, with both arms spread to her sides, not moving a muscle until she lifted one arm, flipping Happy the bird.

He took the finger though and spun her around, looking at her smirking before plopping down next to her.

Alex still wasn't sure why he'd insisted on sharing a room with her, since she'd thought he would at least try to get himself some pink fun for the night. Not that he couldn't still do that. He could just grab her and fuck her around the corner or in whatever bathroom was available.

His words from the night before coming back to her mind, she doubted that though. Happy wasn't a man to say shit he didn't mean. But she still wasn't sure. She'd thought about it half of the night, the whole goddamn drive down here and she still had a bad feeling. No matter if he meant what he said, that didn't hinder him from waking up ten years later, regretting his decision. Maybe he would change his mind one day and then everything would meet that destruction she feared. She didn't want to lose him. She fucking needed him.

Then again, he wasn't known for something like this either. He still stuck with his decision he made when he was sixteen. That was weird. If there was an age you was allowed to regret what you did it was sixteen, but Happy didn't. He was a pretty resolute person and still used to say he would've done everything the way he had and he meant it.

Seeing him now, laying on his side, his eyes closed while his expression let her know he was completely at ease, she couldn't help the urge to lift her hand, caressing his cheek gently.

Happy didn't react to her touch, but she knew he wasn't asleep. Watching him for a while longer, she finally gave in to her need and leaned forward, placing a soft kiss to his lips.

Her heart skipped a beat when they met, as if it was the first time she had ever kissed him. It wasn't. But this was different. This wasn't her telling a friend she loved him. This was her crossing a line she avoided crossing for almost a year that made her almost unable to breath. And it felt as if her heart jumped out of her chest and fell right back into her stomach as he suddenly emulated her deeds, doing nothing but moving his lips to return the kiss gently as if it was the most normal thing in the world. And maybe it was. Maybe it was long overdue. Though, her breath was shaky when she pulled away slightly, barely inches from his face before he opened his eyes, looking into her own in a peaceful kinda way.

They didn't move and stayed like this, while his hand came up, his index-finger finding its way beneath her chin before his thumb brushed her lip softly.

It was then when his hand went further, onto the back of her neck where he applied slight pressure, inching her forward. And while Alex felt as if the world begun to spin, he pulled her into a kiss that didn't need long to lose all innocence. It was his tongue peaking out and nudging her lips gently, that made her forget about whatever had made her push him away. So she opened her mouth and couldn't hold back the quiet moan as their tongues met. And she knew, this time she would remember every second of it.

* * *

**Thanks for reading!**

**Please let me know what you think.**

**ReadtoRelax** \- I did laugh when I read your review. Because I had to imagine Happy pulling back a barking Alex as if she's an angry Jack Russel :D

**Samantha Renk** \- And I did laugh here too, because I can literally see how Happy gets a leash out of the blue and puts it around her neck. Well, I guess your questions is somehow answered in this chapter :-)


	6. No Kidding

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay, life just happened to get in the way. But I guess, all of you know times like that. I'm already on the next chapter, so the next update shouldn't take this long.

Usually I'm not a big fan of diary-like day-to-day fics, but I think those days gonna be an important time for those two, so I think I'll go into that a little deeper.

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

It all started with him not feeling like attending the party at the clubhouse on Friday; with them sitting together in her living room, being piss-drunk, while talking about dirty secrets, after he'd made goo-goo eyes at those robes she'd taken home from a photo-shoot; with him trying to coax her into showing him those goddamn photos for hours. Photos he had yet to see, since she didn't show him shit.

However, the secrets flowed.

Despite that, Happy couldn't remember much about that night. Actually, Alex was the only one remembering anything specific, but he would never forget about the kiss that somehow led them to a night full of whatever had happened. He'd felt intoxicated, rapturous, frenzy — something that started out taken by an awkward uncertainty, slowly but steady gained heat and desire.

And the last thing he certainly remembered was Alex kissing her way down his throat before she reached his neck, placing a bite-mark to his skin that remained there for days. Something that earned him one hell of a boner…and stupid wiggling eyebrows from her brother days later, since Tig only knew one woman that was leaving that kind of mark on a man's skin.

But that wasn't how he felt now. This time he felt something he hadn't felt in a very long time. This time there was this exciting moment their tongues met and he felt those stupid bugs going crazy. He probably hadn't felt this since the moment he'd kissed Sarah for the first time. That girl he used to be with when he was young and stupid fifteen, after he'd chased her for more than a year.

The kiss was deep, mesmerizing, slowly taking away whatever control was left in him…kinda stupefying

Her tongue wasn't aggressive. It wasn't challenging. It didn't fight. It was soft and smooth, dancing around his own as if it was listening to some cadenced latin sounds, inviting him to join the heated rhythm.

Happy wasn't quite sure how, but they somehow managed to end up with Alex straddling his lap, his shirt decorating the shade of the lamp on the nightstand. His hoodie carelessly thrown to the floor, two pairs of boots were kicked into whatever direction they went. He broke the kiss, leaving her breathless as his thumb trailed across her lips, feeling her heavy breath hitting the calloused tip, while her fingers feathery caressed the little wrinkles on his lower abdomen that were caused from the sitting position, right atop his waistline.

He heard something in him scream to get freed when the tip of her forefinger dipped beneath his waistband. But he pushed the begging beast back as she leaned forward, kissing his lips, trailing down his stubbled cheek until she reached his neck.

Closing his eyes he enjoyed the rarely felt touch, simultaneously preparing himself for the stinging sensation coming from her teeth that was equal parts arousing and painful. But it never came. Instead her lips went upwards, erratically sucking sensitive skin into her mouth gingerly.

He found his right hand on her back, slowly trailing down to her butt, his left buried deep into her hair, while she kissed her way down his neck, reaching his collarbone.

His eyes still closed he devoured the sensation of her tongue licking along those letters which were covering the spot since the day he turned twenty-five.

She then nibbled her way up the other side of his neck softly, and finally he hissed in pain and let out a grunt full of arousal as he felt her teeth sinking into his skin.

There was a deep groan leaving his lips, encouraging her to suck the skin of the very spot in harshly, making sure at least one man on earth knew what had happened — yet, Happy didn't give a shit.

His hands slid up her side, slowly pushing up the thin fabric that was covering her upper body, firmly sensing every single rip beneath the smooth surface while he leaned his head to the side, giving her more space. He felt her tongue licking across his neck, gingerly apologizing to the prior abused skin.

He still remembered what she'd told him that night. He knew about her favorite positions, he knew about her struggle to find a man that was able to please her. He knew about that auspicious affinity she actually had about those goddamn, fucking robes.

And there had been times he'd thought it was this talk making him interested in her this kinda way in the first place. But nowadays he knew the talk rather poured oil in a fire that was already blazing. Like that infamous little drip that overflowed the goddamn barrel.

Alex wasn't much of a corny girl, he knew that. There wasn't much of romance in her; not the usual one. She didn't go for candlelight dinners, she didn't like to get flowers on Valentine's Day, and she took no liking to those ridiculous teddy bears which were holding a fluffy heart that said _I Love You_. She had no love for icky movies and she definitely wasn't waiting for the toe-curling kiss from a boy. She wasn't looking for some sweetness, like being fucked while she was bedded on roses. Alex was, indeed, her brother's sister after all.

Although, Happy wasn't sure if he wanted to go further in a shitty flophouse in the middle of nowhere. It wasn't the place itself, it was the thin walls that barely deserved to be called a wall and surely weren't made to muffle any kind of noises. Even though he didn't give a shit if anybody knew what he was doing, this wasn't the usual stuff he got from some insignificant bitch he didn't give a shit about either. This was Alex, and he wasn't amped up about hearing whistles and catcalls from a brother next door on each side of the room. Brothers that knew who was with him in that goddamn room while they were literally waiting for them to reach the fucking touchdown zone.

He also wasn't thrilled by the thought of her being jerk-off material to whatever underfucked brother was out there to listen while he was sure, she wasn't either. Alex might have been one kinky little devil, but he also knew, she damn sure liked to keep shit like that private.

"Yo, Hap…you gonna come with us?"

So he wasn't sure if it was anger, relief or disappointment hitting him when there was a loud bang at the door. But he was sure it was the first, when the next one came and Alex sat up straight again. She gave him this capitulating sigh and this mind-blowing pout — Happy felt the heavy urge to fucking kill. That couldn't be.

"Hap?" Yes, it could.

You didn't crash into another charter and enjoyed their hospitality without at least greeting the local members. Lorca just happened to be the one reminding him of that knick-knack he'd forgotten about completely in that unexpected and hypnotizing rush he was thrown into.

"Shit." So there wasn't much more that left his lips as he let out another deep breath in frustration. He really didn't want to fucking stop, he didn't want to fucking leave.

"Go." But he knew he better do that and she knew that too, though she didn't protest as he leaned forward, pulling her into another deep kiss, that was broken just seconds later by another bang, followed by a low growl leaving his throat; "Jesus fucking Christ, I'm coming!"

. . . . .

When he came back hours later, Alex was fast asleep.

* * *

_Eight months earlier…_

"Are you fucking kidding me? You show Donut your fucking tits? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Alex wasn't sure if she should've laughed or cry, while Happy looked at her in a mix of shock and fury. Or maybe she should've just slapped him in the face for talking to her like that. Perhaps she should've just ignored him and walk away. Though, she did none of that and rather crossed her arms over her chest, allowing her eyes to tell him how pissed she was. He sure had a thing for the word _fuck _today.

"Actually it was just one tit, you know?"

He growled lowly…dangerously, towering over her as if he was a damn hulk, his expression showing how angry he was, his painfully livid eyes boring into her. His height and broad chest made her appear sort of smallish.

Alex though…well, if there was one thing she'd learned throughout the past fifteen years it was, bearing the dangerous look from a pissed biker. No matter how big, no matter how crazy people thought he was.

So she let out a sigh and shook her head, rolling her eyes at him irritated.

"Jesus, Hap…I didn't rip off my shirt to show him my tits…All I did is getting a damn piercing. Because I know he's good and knows what he's doing. What do you think? I'm gonna go to some strange fucker, knowing shit about his skills and allow him to push a damn cannula through my nipple? What the fuck is wrong with _you_?"

Alex hoped those words would ease the surrounding tension somehow, would make him calm down a little, but all she achieved was the opposite. If anything she'd a feeling he came closer and pushed her against the wall, although he wasn't moving one damn inch. As if he was one of those Sith Lords, having the ability to lift you off the ground and squeeze your throat with nothing but the power of thoughts, while he actually stood six feet away.

"For fuck's sake! Why do you need a fucking piercing there?"

Alex cocked a brow. He was sounding like one of those overly possessive control-freaks.

Yet, she didn't have any of it and held his gaze just as stubborn and dark, her throat rumbling with anger.

"Because I like it."

And once again he growled dangerously, apparently thinking he could teach her the meaning of fear. He wasn't. He would never hurt her, no matter how livid he was. Alex still remembered the day she fucked it up completely by getting arrested after a raid in a nightclub. The accusation of drug possession thickening the air heavily after he'd bailed her out. He gave her one of those never-ending rants, asking her how he was meant to keep the promise he made to her brother when she did such stupid things. That night, he absolutely lost it and punched a big-ass whole into the wall, breaking two of his fingers with it. He had given her the opportunity to look into her bathroom without leaving the living-room, but he would never harmed one hair on her stubborn head.

"What about you? How many bitches saw your dick lately?"

So she still wasn't fearing him, although she felt those pitch-black eyes bore into her chest, searing her apart inch by inch.

"Not the same." He replied lowly, taking a step closer. She didn't back off though. She instead felt rage rise within her chest too. She was absolutely beyond tired of this…bullshit.

"Right…when I went to Donut, we both knew it would be just that. He's doing a piercing, I'm putting my shirt back on, be happy about it and that's it…when you go to those bitches, they all know they'll get a chance suck you off…so what is your damn problem?"

"What is my…what…He's my goddamn brother!" Happy snapped.

"Yeah and one of my best friends…oh, and not to forget, my partner who I watch doing piercings for more than three years now. I trust him and he's already seen them before, when he accidentally caught me in the shower. So what?"

Alex really hadn't meant to say that.

"He did WHAT?"

Because she knew, now it was Donut who was damned to feel the consequences. On the other hand, being around the MC for years or not, she really, really didn't see the fucking problem here.

So she ignored the feeling of guilt directed to her friend and threw her arms in the air, letting out an annoyed sigh as she turned around to leave the hallway; "Geez, Hap…get your shit together and calm down."

"We're not done, Alex!" Also ignoring his demanding tone she once again rolled her eyes when she reached her bedroom.

"Yes, we are!" And with that, she slammed the door shut.

* * *

_Today…_

When her eyes fluttered open, Alex squeezed them shut immediately, groaning by the bright sunlight threatening to burn her pupils.

She felt like she had been hit by a truck. Her back was aching from too many hours on the road, her head was trying to talk her brain into exploding.

There was a muscular, heavily inked arm wrapped around her waist, a hand holding her tight to a broad chest, a nose being buried into her hair, steady breath hitting her neck slightly…and not to forget, that unmistakable morning-wood that was pressed into her left ass-cheek.

She smiled at the last, realizing that, however he'd made it, she never felt this part of him yet. At least, she didn't remember.

Feeling curiosity getting the better of her, she couldn't stop her hips from wiggling in the attempt to estimate the size. But she wasn't able to. All she could tell was, he wasn't Lexington Steele, though, he wasn't Tuan either. There definitely were way more than two inches of hard dick pressed against her butt.

Alex hadn't noticed when he came back from the clubhouse. But when she forced her eyes open and took a look at the clock on the nightstand, she wasn't surprised. It was almost ten and with him still sleeping soundly, she knew it had to be pretty late.

Happy was one of those people with multiple routines. And one of them was, that he never slept longer than exactly eight hours. He did good with that or less, but on days he slept longer he used to be unbearable moody and grumpy. So, no matter when he went to sleep, as long as he wasn't too drunk or high to think of it, he sat the alarm on exactly eight hours and ten minutes later, knowing he wouldn't fall asleep right away. This habit was an annoying one when they slept in the same bed, because it always woke her up too. She got used to it though…sort of; in the meantime she was even able to just go back to sleep again.

Happy had a lot of those routines and a lot of them were just as annoying, but she guessed this was okay. It wasn't as if she didn't have any of those. Like always forgetting to lock the fucking door.

However, while he still slept, he wasn't back until at least one thirty, considering she smelled his shower gel and the remains of dope still lingering in the air. He'd sure spent some time here before he went to sleep.

Wiggling her hips again she tried to free herself out of his firm grip carefully.

"If you don't stop to wiggle that sweet ass, we gonna have problem."

Alex was surprised that she hadn't noticed he was awake, though, given by his voice, awake wasn't the actually term to call it. She still couldn't help the smile coming to her lips though.

"You let go of me then?" She said nonetheless, trying to get his hand of off her, in vain.

"No." And she wiggled again, hoping to change his mind, but all she achieved was him pulling her closer.

"I need to pee." She whined, desperate to leave the bed, while Happy obviously wasn't convinced; "Let go."

"Gross, Hap…please tell me you aren't getting off on that shit." She said, a grimace starting to form on her face. She didn't think so, but when it came to him, nobody could now. Happy was full of mystery, and part of those things used to be pretty crazy.

"What if I do?"

Jumping forward she spun around quickly, looking at him with a cocked brow, while she wasn't sure if she should be worried or not. But the smirk coming to his face told her all she had to know and caused her fist to land into his blanket covered ribs before he opened his eyes, a laughter coming out of him loudly, which made her punch him again and again and again and…"Happy!" just before he grabbed both of her wrists and pulled her forward, making her crash down onto his chest roughly, the devilish smirk still on his lips. A smirk that finally turned into a smile, one she returned ever so slightly.

And it wasn't until his right hand came into her view, tugging away a few streaks of wild her, when his expression slowly changed into a more serious one.

"Changed your mind?" He then said and she felt her heart ache when she recognized the spark of disappointment in his voice, especially considering Happy wasn't one to show this kinda things openly.

Lifting her right arm she rested it bent onto his chest, her hand reaching upwards to let her fingertips tickle his stubbled chin. She liked that stubble; way more than the freshly shaved skin that almost felt as soft as a baby's bottom. His stubble were so much more…manlike — not that Happy was lacking on manliness at all.

It still felt weird and unreal, just like it had felt like one of those dream when he'd left to the clubhouse the day before and she still wasn't able to wrap her mind around all of this, but she didn't change shit. It was way too late for that, even before she'd made the bold move and kissed him. It probably was too late before they'd even noticed anything.

"No…" She said softly, trailing off before his lips twitched into a small smile again, his fingertips emulating her deeds on her jawbone.

"There's just a lot of things going through my head, you know? I need to figure this out for me and then we need to figure this out for us and…maybe we should…" She trailed of again, suddenly feeling stupid for what almost came out of her. When she'd thought about it the day before, it certainly sounded less ridiculous.

"…keep it between us for now?" She looked up at him when he finished her stupid words and felt even stupider. How could she even think about asking this from him?

"Didn't think it would sound this shitty." She said, taking a deep breath while pushing back a few hair that were tickling her neck. Or maybe she was just nervous, feeling anxious of fucking this up before it even started, so she tried to do anything to distract herself.

"Two emotional cripples try to figure this shit out…I didn't expect you to jump into a honeymoon with me right away."

"I sure have no idea what a honeymoon would be with you."

"Pretty rubber-burning period." He said with such a dry voice, making her chuckle slightly.

Finally Alex leaned forward to rest her head on his chest sideways, slowly stroking the inked skin beneath her fingertips while she sure enjoyed the silence for a while, as much as the warmth that radiated off of his shirtless body.

"Not sure though, how long I'll be able to lay next to you and act all platonic while the only thing I wanna do is kiss the shit out of you."

"Wow…you need to be careful, Hap…that easily could've been mistaken as something romantic."

Alex grinned when he grunted not so sweet anymore. Nonetheless his arm went around her further, hugging her tightly, while she already moved up her head, placing a soft kiss to his jawbone; "Never asked you to act platonic while laying next to me."

Putting his chin onto his chest he looked at her smirking, before she pecked him on the lips, finally moving to crawl off of him and the bed; "I'm gonna take a piss."

Happy grunted when she finally stood on the ground, watching her walk towards the bathroom; "That was so not girly, Alex."

And she turned, giving him a cocked brow in amusement; "Could've been worse." before he raised one too; "Could've said I need to take a shit." and she couldn't help the giggle escaping her by his unmistakable disgusted grimace. As if she'd destroyed his whole world.

"I take it that you don't have a thing for dookie then." She added, her giggle turning into a laugh when he suddenly threw a pillow at her, his scowl telling her he sure was less amused than her when she entered the intended room and closed the door shut.

Reentering the bedroom Happy was still in bed, sitting against the headboard while he was busy typing on his phone. He finished what he was doing before throwing the device onto the mattress, suddenly reaching out for her.

When she took his hand, she allowed him to pull her on top of him, returning his thoughtful look curiously.

"What is it?" She asked, when he hadn't said anything after she'd sat on his lap for ages.

Taking a visible breath he shrugged his shoulders when letting it out again.

"How do I act around you?…Outside."

"How did you act around Clarissa?"

He squeezed his eyes shut in agony, opening one just a little again slowly after Alex mentioned the New York charter VP's daughter. Happy had a fling with the girl nine years earlier, for around three months when he was there, taking care of some business.

He sure did have a time when he used to do incredible stupid things that left behind nothing but a bitter aftertaste, especially when it came to women. Those things probably were a few events that he sure wasn't proud of. He still was a thorn in the VP's side, still giving him the urge to beat the shit out of him, although he'd already done that…twice. The first time when he found out about it, the second when his daughter's marriage crashed because of the very fling, more or less ruined the pretty life she'd built up with a husband that obviously wasn't quite able to fuck her right.

In Alex's book it wasn't Happy's fault. He just took advantage of Clarissa's curiosity, that perhaps would've been less tremendous if her father hadn't made it pretty clear that his brothers were off-limits and vice versa. Alex was sure she would've done the exact same thing if Tig had've been one of those guys you could find all over the MC — fortunately he wasn't.

Actually her brother was quite the opposite, being absolutely thrilled by the thought of her becoming an Old Lady. It wasn't only the pride he felt towards the MC, it was the certainty that she would've been safe and protected, no matter what. There was nobody he trusted as much as his brothers.

Leaning forward she placed a kiss to his lips, causing his eyes to open completely again.

"They're used to us being all fucking sweet. They won't notice shit as long as you don't fuck me right in front of their eyes."

And even if they did, Alex didn't care. They wouldn't call them out on it immediately and it wasn't her goal to make him her dirty little secret. All she wanted was some time to adjust to that new development while she wanted to be sure about all of this before making anything official. She wasn't about to tell him that though. This was just her pretty complicated and nerve-busting way to overthink everything before being sure about anything. She would get there and then everything would be fine; she just needed a minute for that. But this wasn't something he needed to know, it would just make him worry, giving him the feeling he made a mistake. It wasn't like that, so why make him feel bad? It would've just been a reason for him to take a step back, while this was the last she wanted. Situations like this helped her a lot to beat her overly anxious ass, considering those moments felt too good to be wrong.

"Sweet, huh?" He said lowly, his lips brushing her own in the process and instead of an answer she just smiled cockily, pulling him in for a kiss that deepened immediately.

His hand went to the back of her neck and it wasn't long until he moved to turn her back onto the mattress, with him hovering over her, the kiss becoming more passionate with every moment.

Alex almost jumped in shock and Happy stopped breathless his deeds when suddenly a bang sounded at the door, the prospects voice coming through the wooden somewhat shaky; "We gonna head out in thirty!"

While resting his forehead onto her shoulder, Alex sighed and tried to push away the well-known tingly heat that already reached her center as a frustrated and raspy growl hit her neck;

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

* * *

I hope you enjoyed the read. Please let me know what you think :-)


	7. Welcome To Charming

Disclaimer: I do not own the SOA-characters or the story. I only own my OC.

* * *

The drive to California took way longer than expected. The already tied-up traffic made the guys hit the 89 somewhere near Pioneer, taking them on a long way around, before making it to Sacramento where they switched to the interstate again. The detour of almost two hours was pretty much the reason for Alex feeling like shit when they arrived in Charming. She was sure there would've been a shorter route, but who was she to tell them what to do? Happy told her to ride in the van, but she wouldn't listen. So she kept sitting behind him and now felt stiff like a goddamn board.

It was around nine when they finally made it to the small and little shitty-town Tig insisted on calling his home nowadays.

They didn't even bother with going to the clubhouse, since the party wasn't until the next day. Tig had called to let her know he wouldn't be in town when they arrived anyway, because he was stuck in Oakland, protecting his President's ass while Clay took care of some business, and he wouldn't be home until late.

Alex wasn't about to argue, since her plan was simple, but could've become pretty complicated in case they made it to TM. She was bent on dodging the Queen as long as possible. That way, at least, shit wouldn't hit the fan before she was able to tell her brother Happy Birthday.

Still riding behind Happy, she leaned her temple against his back and took in her already dark surroundings.

She couldn't help but to sigh. Charming wasn't her kinda thing; not for longer than a few days. It was too small, too clean and too quiet. The never-ending heat was unbearable and she didn't like the fact that everyone knew fucking everyone, while everyone also knew what everyone did during the day. This persistent silence made your mind become louder, and if you drove through Main Street you were surprised to find it actually paved while you unsuccessfully watched out for those Wild-West shootouts and Saloons from the movies. Hell, there was even a pubescent boy polishing shoes at Floyd's while the old codger was cutting the residents' hair or shaved their beards.

Alex didn't need all that bullshit. Nessi was taking care of her hair and throughout the last thirty-five years Happy hadn't missed that there were razors to buy in the supermarket to do the shaving himself. He didn't give a shit about his shoes and his head was pretty shaved too these days, another feat that was easily done with the razors from the supermarket.

The idyllic little town — as pretty and beautiful it might have been in so many eyes — was nothing but unpleasant to her. Alex didn't feel comfortable; she felt watched and observed and even at night she felt the urgent need to pull a balaclava over her head. And that without planning to rob the little bank downtown, which she thought didn't have much to steal anyway.

She liked it big. She liked the anonymous life. The fact that she still didn't know more than a handful people in her neighborhood was somewhat appealing to her. She only knew well the families right next to her. To her left and to her right, that was it. Although she couldn't rule out that the never-ending Harley-crown in front of her door wasn't the reason for that.

However, she loved the noise, she loved the goddamn dust and dirt. She loved those big streets as much as she loved to not knowing every goddamn cop by his name. And - for fuck's sake, did she love Walmart, Target and so on. Charming was driving her insane. Lenny didn't even have the fractional part of all the shit she usually needed and on her last visit she had to search three fucking stores to find the least. A real mall wasn't much more than a dream. Lucky for her, she hadn't gained any weight at her feet, because the last time she had to go to the next city to get herself an acceptable pair of shoes.

Jesus fucking Christ…she fucking loved Tacoma!

After they made it to his place, Alex opened the door with the key Tig had given her the day he moved in and leaned sighing against the wall, closing her eyes, while the Prospect brought in the bags that were still in the back of the van.

When Happy was done with bossing him around, the boy took off to the motel the rest of the guys stayed in and finally they were alone, surrounded by nothing but wonderful silence and peace.

She really didn't get how those guys could make this kind of trips with such easiness. Her back hurt like a bitch, her head too, her legs where wobbly and there was nothing she wanted as badly as a long and relaxing shower.

As she opened her eyes slowly, she found Happy leaning against the wall across from her, a smirk on his lips that got even wider when her stomach began to grumble. By all the stiff pain she really forgot about her hunger, what a shame.

Pushing herself from the wall she sighed once more before going on a hunt for one of those frozen pizzas Tig used to hide somewhere in his freezer, since his feeding nowadays consisted of TV dinners and Gemma's delicacies. That woman at least seemed to be good for something else than being such an annoying bitch.

Alex looked at Happy, getting just a confirming nod in response before she took out two of those culinary turpitudes and went to the oven. And it wasn't until she opened its door that she cocked a brow in confusion, stopping short of completing her task. For a second she stared at what she'd found, a little perplexed maybe. But then she put the pizzas onto the counter-top and opened one of the drawers to get a fork before she fumbled with the grate until she pulled out what had caught her attention.

"Jesus ,Tigger."

For sure dumbfounded, she looked at the pink thong that was dangling down the forks teeth.

Happy tried to suppress a laugh which caused an ugly snorting noise leaving his nostrils, while she looked at him and then back at the thong, repeating this twice.

Well, this was something new.

"Should I worry?" She asked, still a little baffled and suddenly Happy broke out into a loud laughter, turning around while trying to hide his face behind his hand, shaking his head in the process.

She had to admit, she had a lot of crazy kinks herself, but her brother always seemed to top her with ease. Not that she was surprised…or judged. She'd stopped doing both a long time ago when she was around nineteen and found some lube and a dildo that damn sure wasn't hers, hidden in the closet in the hallway behind the washer. She still refused to think anything specific into that and just told herself both had belonged to the girl Tig was involved with at the time. But deep down she knew, it hadn't.

Walking over to the trash can she threw the thong into the bin along the fork she'd used to get it out. She then took the pizzas to put them back into the freezer again.

"Chinese?" Happy asked still smirking and she just gave him a confirming nod. As much as she accepted her brother's craziness, her appetite for pizza was gone.

. . . . . .

Alex certainly was surprised that there actually was a delivery-service still available. As far as she knew, Charming went to sleep at eight.

They'd taken showers in turns to avoid missing the doorbell ring, though she was sure the food wasn't even cooked when Happy was done. This was another of his habits; a less annoying but still weird one. He never showered longer than exactly nine minutes, as if he'd set an alarm right next to him. He didn't. Just as he didn't have any signal for the two minutes being over when he brushed his teeth. She'd even clocked the time multiple times, what earned her a confused look from him…and creeped the shit out of her when she saw he stopped brushing when something pretty close to 120 seconds had passed. As if he had this inner clock, telling him when the time was over.

She remembered Missy used to have this clock. She could've been god knows where, but always ran to the door when Alex got home from school, every single day. Tig had told her she sometimes slept at the other end of the house, certainly not hearing her. Yet, she ran towards the door exactly five minutes before Alex came home, her tail starting to wiggle when four minutes had passed.

Not that she was comparing Happy to a dog; if anything he was the owner.

They'd eaten in silence, not feeling the need to interrupt the calm serenity, before they splayed out across the couch, Alex in front of him paying less attention to an uninteresting movie on the TV.

She was surprised that she could actually do this. Usually she wasn't much of a cuddle-bear in California. Due to the heat, she seldom was able to be close to another person that way; not for long. The temperature actually didn't bother her, since her brother had installed an air conditioner at one point. Though, Alex never did well with the weather the Sunshine State offered, and her body always reacted as if an invisible force was telling her to overheat whenever she crossed the State's border. She was glad that she wasn't feeling like a melting mess right now, and she turned around, snuggling further into him with her face buried into the crook of his neck. She loved his scent. It was masculine and clean, always able to make her belly tighten, sending a hot flash down her pubic bone.

Wearing nothing but a thin, tight and cropped tank, and some thin black cotton shorts, her exposed legs were able to feel the thick denim of his jeans, while his hands seemed to be glued to her waist.

Until now situations like that eventually ended in pure torture for her. Because she always felt like she had to hold back, to keep herself in check, to not say or do anything wrong that clashed with those damn rules they'd set for themselves all those months ago. But now she wasn't. Now she could do whatever pleased her. Right? She didn't have to hold back.

Though, despite what had happened in Rogue River, Alex couldn't help the tingly feeling that mainly was located in her belly.

She didn't know what caused the feeling though. It was ridiculous to be nervous. They'd already done so many things that sure weren't to find in the palsy-walsy zone, there was no reason to be nervous. She wanted this for so long while pushing away all those needs, that she shouldn't be nervous; if anything, she should've been all over him already.

Maybe it was because they were here now. The time in Rogue River felt so unreal to her. Like one of those things that could've been called _what_ _happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas_.

That they now laid on her brother's couch while it still continued sort of told her, is wasn't a dream or a movie or something her desperate mind had made up for her. This was real.

So she swallowed the antsy feeling and placed a soft kiss to his neck. It wasn't more than a little peck, hardly palpable. But she knew he hadn't missed it, as his thumb suddenly started to draw small circled onto her skin.

She was aware that continence wasn't part of his program; and neither was shyness. She wasn't quite as blunt as him, but they had this in common. So him doing nothing but that, was just as unlikely as her belly threatening to explode, being overcrowded with those damn butterflies. But maybe she wasn't alone with that. Maybe she wasn't the only one feeling this tension. Maybe they had this in common too. In the end, it wasn't just her doing nothing like this since he'd pulled her into that mind-blowing kiss before they'd left the motel-room in Oregon.

She placed another kiss to his skin, just above the mark she'd left there the day before, realizing she really had to gain some control over her teeth. On the other hand, maybe not; she did have a feeling that he liked it.

When her tongue came out to caress the angry red spot, he suddenly leaned his head to the side, giving her more space.

His hand on her waist went lazy and only drew her closer, when she inherited the circles around his cephalic vein; "I wanna feel you so bad." She whispered, feeling him swallow thickly while he literally pressed her body against his, his lips brushing her ear when he spoke in a low growl.

"Telling me that, while we wait for your brother to come home anytime soon, isn't the best way to make me happy, girl."

"Not gonna be able to keep that from him anyway."

She placed another wet kiss to his skin, obviously causing a deep and shaky breath to leave him slowly, before another attempt to swallow made his Adam's apple bob.

"Pretty sure, you don't want him to learn about it by your winking feet with your legs thrown over my shoulder." She hummed in agreement, yet she couldn't help the smile making its way to her lips; "I really like that position. Best way to hit the right spot."

He grunted and grumbled and growled and finally he tugged her even closer, if that was possible; "Fucking tease."

"I'm sure your dick is big enough to make me scream that way."

Twisting her upper leg between his, she slid upward, allowing her thigh to rub slightly at his crotch; "You need to stop playing with fire, girl."

She pushed her leg further, simultaneously letting her hand trail down the wife-beater he wore, feeling the flexing muscles through the thin material as she spoke; "But I like it hot and dangerous."

But she stopped, right above his waistline, her leg sliding down again as she snuggled back into her innocent position from before; "But maybe you're too old for this after such a long ride."

It was then when he suddenly pushed her up into a sitting position and before she knew what happened, she was pulled up from the couch and thrown over his shoulder. She screamed and giggled when he turned to leave the living-room, not bothering with turning off the TV or lights, carrying her through the hallway right towards the spare-room her brother always had prepared for her. As if she'd made it a habit to show up on his door-steps without previous announcement.

"What about my brother?"

"Gonna show him what an old man is capable of."

She still giggled as he kicked the door shut and locked it neatly and it took just seconds for her to be literally thrown onto the mattress.

He didn't make a big deal out of crawling onto the bed, more or less straddling her while standing on his knees.

He growled, and all she could do was pulling her lower lips between her teeth. But then she gasped when he suddenly grabbed the collar of her tank and with one jolt ripped the fabric apart with no mercy.

She sure hadn't expected this to happen.

She liked that top. She really did. But every protest she could think of was swallowed by a moan that was forced out of her throat by the mere action. Never having seen him like this, she already loved this side of him. It made her melt away in his hands even without him touching her; made her feel like some bitch in heat on a leash. The tingly feeling twitching in her center almost hitting an unbearable point.

For a second he stared down at her bare breasts, the aggressiveness in his eyes slowly being replaced by an unmistakable desire.

Cupping both mounds with strong hands, he leaned forward before pulling her in for a heated kiss; "Fucking perfect."

With his hands kneading them vigorously, his mouth deepening the kiss in such a dangerously passionated direction.

Her hand pushed up his shirt, impatiently forcing him to break the kiss, to rip it over his head just as eagerly.

And he pinned her hands to the sheets above her head before he leaned forward, kissing his way down her cheek, trailing down her neck and collarbone. He was literally devouring her until he finally reached the object of desire before sucking one nipple hungrily into his mouth, causing a never felt static sensation ripping through her whole body. However he was doing that, it was driving her insane.

He switched to her right, teasing the sensitive nub with that skillful mouth as his left roamed down her side, searching for her waistband.

"In a rush?" She asked; "Fuck!" as he suddenly bit down on her nipple, causing her cry out loudly before she stupidly smiled to herself. He probably was. And she was absolutely fine with that.

He released her breast, leaving behind a cold sensation but created a new one, when his tongue trailed down her stomach. Switching his position to kneel between her legs as his fingers hooked into her waistband, he pushed down the thing fabric to reveal her body completely.

He stared at her core for a moment, his parted lips allowing her to see his tongue swirling in his mouth, before he looked up at her, his eyes hooded with cravings.

She went up on her elbows, watching his every move, as he then went to lay down onto his stomach, his hands sliding around her thighs to spread them, holding them in place.

And she felt static shock flashing through her stomach, when his tongue came out, tipping against her hood once, a yearning whimper of her filling the quiet room. One that quickly turned into a quiet moan, as he begun to flick his tongue over her clit, suddenly sucking her into his voracious mouth.

Sucking, licking, nibbling, biting, the growls and grunts escaping him told her she wasn't the only one enjoying this. Yet, she was the only one jumping towards the edge with big steps, her head thrown back into her neck, as she tried to fight against his grip; tried to push her hips further into him.

She gave up on that when he stubbornly held her in place and then suddenly his arm was circling her lower abdomen, before she gasped in surprise, feeling two fingers entering her opening, pumping in and out in a steady rhythm.

"Alex?" Her heavy pants were caught in her throat and her head flew up in shock as suddenly a quiet knock sounded from the door, the voice of her brother showing off some serious worry.

She was just about to try and get the strength to tell him she was fine, when he tried to turn the nob; "A…" but he never made it to calling out her name again, "Oh fuck, yes!" because Happy hooked his fingers and suddenly begun wiggling them inside of her violently, his circling tongue pressing into the one fucking point at the same time, the multiple stimuli almost too much to stay sane.

The next thing she heard was Tig whistling to himself while his footsteps fade away, and when she looked down, Happy pulled away from her core, a satisfied and confident smirk on his face.

He'd told her he wouldn't allow anyone to stop them again. Yet, she wasn't sure if this really was better than her winking feet.

* * *

After hearing those noises coming out of the spare-room, Tig wasn't able to hide the smug grin that was spreading all over his face, which Happy and Alex pretended to ignore while dancing around the obvious in slick perfection.

Though the Sergeant kept his mouth shut, knowing if they wanted to talk about it, they would, but if they didn't, there was no way to make them. Both were the incarnation of pigheaded stolidity.

But, it was pointless to hide shit from him. Even without the noises and without discovering that aggressive hickey on his brother's neck, he knew something had changed. He'd already known when he'd spent a few days in Vegas with him.

Watching Happy for almost two weeks, turning down every pussy that eagerly offered her services, Tig knew something was off. It wasn't like he ever tried to do the right thing by suppressing primal needs to please some bitch's possessiveness; it was beyond obvious that he didn't harbor any interests at all.

But, unlike a lot of other guys, Tig wasn't surprised. Happy's life was all about loyalty; it always had been.

It was hard, almost impossible to earn the Killer's love, but once you did, he was the most loyal man you could ever hope to meet. That was the whole secret behind his personality so many people weren't able to understand. That was what made him such a good Son. That was who he was for the club, and that was who he was for all the people he cared about. He would never betrayed the club, he would never betrayed his family and he would never betrayed a woman he truly loved, no matter what kind of a betrayal it was.

Though, it had been a long fucking time since he'd seen his brother acting like that.

Back then Happy didn't use to be like he was now. There had been times he hadn't acted like a sex-driven nymphomaniac who was going crazy when he didn't get pussy for too long. There had been times Happy used to be completely different. It were times he lived up to his name; where he stuck to the one woman which waited for him at home, not even placing a damn hand on a sweetbutts ass. Simply because he wasn't interested.

Those were times that were almost forgotten because it wasn't mentioned anymore, since the opportunity of Happy losing it dangerously was a big one, even ten years later. The last one brave enough to do otherwise and even go as far as tease the Killer because he was pissed, left the hospital four days later, being covered in cuts and bruises, with a still broken nose, a fractured jaw, a dislocated shoulder and some bullshit-story about an accident on the road, made up by nobody else than the Tacoma President himself.

Victoria had been the woman Happy loved with all he had since the day he'd met her when he was around twenty-one. The woman he wanted to settle down with. The woman he wanted to give those two and a half kids, a white picket fence and fucking diamond-ring.

Though, nowadays, she was nothing but a bad memory; the invisible ghost which was haunting the man for almost ten years; the root of all evil. Not only in Tig's eyes was she the reason for Happy being who he was these days; for him dropping one of his biggest and to him most important principles — sort of breaking him in a horrible and rarely seen way.

There were men that became their fathers spitting image, be it good or bad, but Happy wasn't one of them. Despite all the propensity towards violence that probably was a result of his youth, there was one thing Happy never wanted to do. He'd witnessed too much of his own mother getting beaten to shit, almost to death twice, from a shitty father that finally found his bitter end by the same son he managed to get behind bars when said son barely hit the age of eighteen.

If there was one thing Happy never wanted to do it was hurt a woman.

So, despite his reputation, killing a woman at all was against everything he believed in. But killing the one he loved…that was beyond any cruelty and Tig couldn't even imagine what he'd felt in that moment, just like none of his brothers could. Most of them wouldn't have been able to even think about it, Tig included, but Happy did and he did so much more. And although all that love later had turned into pure hatred, Tig was sure, the second he pulled the trigger, it wasn't just Victoria that died. In that moment, something died in Happy too — he hadn't been always as ruthless and crazy as he was now.

After that, Happy had changed. He went on a run for almost five months, taking over whatever job was offered around the country, and was more or less unavailable for any calls that came from Tacoma. When he came back, he wasn't the same person as before. What once had been only one smiley-face that stood for his deceased father, quickly had changed into four. The already less talkative man became a silent shadow of his former self, only talking when he was asked a question or when he did have to say something serious or important. His predisposition for violence had grown dangerously. His behavior when it came to women had changed into a shocking disrespecting and dismissing one. He only used them, sometimes went as far and call it a thing, while it actually wasn't more than a fling, always accompanied by at least one side-bitch, usually more, no matter how much it hurt the girl.

He didn't trust anyone anymore, except his brothers. And even a Son had a fucking hard time to prove his reliability. There was more than one prospect that never got his colors because of Hap. And even if they made it that far, it easily could turn into years, until they gained his full trust. But a woman, well, Tig didn't know one that actually made it that far. Usually because they didn't stay long enough to even entertain the idea. Though, something told him, they could've stayed for years and never would've made it to the point.

But Alex, she was different. That girl had earned the Killer's trust before she hit puberty. Her multiple proven and profound loyalties weren't a secret. There was no doubt that she would rather put a bullet into her own head before doing what Vicky did.

Tig knew, his sister belonged with those few people that were able to dig a hole through that thick wall Happy had build around his heart. And she was one of the even fewer ones who were stubborn and determined enough to do it all over again in case he build it up again. If there was one woman able to pull him out of this pathological paranoid and stone-hearted shithole, it was her.

But it wasn't just one-sided. Whatever crazy bond those two had developed throughout the years came both ways. Tig still remembered when he'd heard about that fucker Marc leaving her, leaving behind nothing but a wrecked mess that he'd called his sister. Stuck in a wildfire of self contempt, that became reignited by the words the motherfucker had thrown into her face, morphing into an awful mix with that bullshit their father used to tell her daily. She was a girl, she was useless to that sick bastard, and suddenly she didn't even feel like that anymore. It was stupid and irrational, yet Tig knew where she was coming from. That bullshit drilled into her head for so many years, left scars behind, not just mentally.

He went up to Tacoma for weeks back then, trying to help her get out of this unhealthy mess, but he didn't succeed.

It was Happy who was able to climb down into that depressive rabbit-hole and pull her out again, inch by inch. Tig still didn't know how he'd done it, but suddenly she stopped blaming herself for everything; suddenly she stopped seeing herself as nothing but useless. Suddenly she stopped confining herself to her damaged womb.

Yet, Tig hadn't seen it coming. After watching what happened with them all those months ago, he'd also seen what kind of awkward relationship those two had build up around them. He'd already lost any hope that it would ever change, so seeing this now, was probably the biggest fucking surprise and gift possible.

Happy never was rough with her, he barely yelled at her. Tig almost doubted that she'd ever seen the Happy so many brothers knew. She was his soft spot, that changed his whole demeanor without meaning too.

Though, now there was something about the way his hand was placed to her hips when Happy sneaked around her to steal one of the chicken-stripes she was currently roasting.

"Happy!"

And there was something sweet about the way she slapped his hand away, trying to block his huge appearance, as he suddenly spun her around, laughing loudly while pulling her into his chest. Tight enough to hinder her stopping him, before one of the stripes disappeared into his mouth.

"Now one is missing!" A smug grin on his face, Happy looked down at her confidently.

"Gonna put you on a diet…stop the fussing about not fitting outfits."

Tig watched with amusement, chuckling to himself when Alex suddenly hit Happy's chest with a towel, pushing him back out of the kitchen while the Killer barked out a loud laugh.

. . . . . .

"Wanna tell me something?" Tig had tried to not ask. But with all of those thing happening under his roof it was pretty impossible to not get nosy.

But, he hadn't expected anything else than the certainly following; "No!"

"You gonna give me that big-brother talk now?" Pulling out his smokes he offered one to his guest too, lighting it quickly before blowing out a thick cloud towards the sky, knowing they were past every goddamn big-brother talk he could think off; "No!"

* * *

Thanks for reading!

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